(Note from Linda: Based on recent posts on the private FAM Fellowship website and numerous conversations, I know this is a VERY timely message for many! So I hope and pray that everyone standing for marriage restoration who feels that you have taken a step backwards or fallen down will make the right choice and listen to the voice of our Heavenly Father; Who loves us so much that He gave His only begotten Son for us and Who wants nothing but HIS very best for us! And that should be more than enough to bless and encourage all of us, especially if we take Him at His Word and know that NO wisdom, No insight and NO plan can succeed against Him (Proverbs 21:30) and that IF we get back up, WE WILL WALK IN VICTORY! After all, as John 10:4 declares…When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. So know and listen to HIS voice and you will indeed be very blessed and encouraged as you follow HIM!)

*****
“Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand.” Psalm 37:24

When babies first start learning to walk, they do a lot of falling down. My grandbaby is walking very well now, but a few weeks ago she was spending a lot of time falling down. Each time she would fall, I would clap and laugh and act like it was a great accomplishment. As a result, she would get right on up with a great big smile on
her face and take off walking again- she didn’t lay there and cry, or wait for you to pick her up and she didn’t give up.

Do you every feel like that baby learning to walk? Do you ever feel like you spend more time falling down than you do walking? Do you ever feel like for every step you take forward you take two steps back? Do you feel like you make one step then trip and fall on the second step? Honestly, I have felt like that. I still feel like that some times. Some days it’s just so hard to get my “land legs”. Some days my footing isn’t very secure. Some times I feel like I am always falling flat on my face.
When I do wind up “on the ground- flat on my face”, I hear two voices speaking to me. One is the voice of the enemy who spews out his lies, accusations and condemnations at me. He tells me that I will never “get it right”. He tells me I am a failure. He tells me I need to just give up. He encourages me to stay down and not try again. He tells me to lay there and feel sorry for myself- wallow in my pain and hurt and inability. He tries to heap guilt on me. Then there is the other voice. It is the voice of my Father who tells me that it will be all right. Who tells me to get up and try again. Who tells me “you can do it”. Who does for me what I did for my grandbaby. He cheers me on. He tells me I will succeed. He reaches for me, helps me up, stands me back on my feet, dusts me off and sends me on my way. He tells me He still loves me.

I know the same two voices come to you also when you fall. The question is which one are you going to listen to? Are you going to listen to the enemy and lay there and give up? Or are you going to listen to the voice of your loving heavenly Father cheering you on?

Have a great day. The voice you listen to will determine whether you stay down in defeat or get up and walk in victory.

*****
Coffee Break is a morning devotional written by Lorraine Ezell, and available online and sent by email free of charge for the asking from About the Master’s Business Ministry, Inc.
So please feel free to call Lorraine at (601) 833-5278 or E-mail her at [email protected]
And you can visit her on the web at MastersBusiness.org.

(Note from Linda: Karen shared the following message on the private website last night, and since I can’t think of a more powerful illustration and message to bless and encourage every man and woman standing for marriage restoration, I want to share it here as well. What a powerful illustration of just how God works in our lives, and even more so to fully restore our marriages and families-and ALL for HIS glory! So read this and be blessed and encouraged to know that GOD ALWAYS KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING and when He is done, we will se something so much more beautiful and spectacular than we could ever ask dream or imagine! God ALWAYS completes the good work He has begun, so give your ALL to Him, and be blessed and encouraged! The same resurrection power that brought our Lord and Savior up out of that tomb can and will resurrect the deadest and most impossible of marriages if we just trust and obey! So be blessed and encouraged this day as we rejoice and celebrate the greatest act of love ever known to man and the greatest power ever demonstrated on earth!)

*****
Happy Easter, everyone! Christ has risen…He has risen indeed!

We had an early Easter service at our church tonight and up front by the praise band, an artist was at work, completing an entire drawing while we worshiped God. As I watched this artist, I felt like the Lord was whispering to me that He works that same way in our lives and in our marriages.

The artist began with a blank canvas and it was obvious as he worked that he had a vision in his mind’s eye of how the completed canvas would look; although, for a long time, I just couldn’t see it. He seemed to make random strokes and at times appeared to be changing his mind as he ran his hand across parts, smudging and softening lines he had just drawn. Frankly, when he first began drawing and smudging, drawing and smudging, the canvas just looked dirty and not artistic at all. Interestingly enough, the drawing had two focal points; one on each side of the canvas. He would diligently work on one side and then go to the other and then methodically back to the first. Part of the time, I could not even see what he was doing because his back was to me and my view was blocked. Eventually, I thought I could see pictures forming and tried to guess at what he was drawing; only later to be proven wrong as the drawing took on a different look. Finally, I trusted the artist to work and took my attention off him and returned to praising and worshiping the greatest Artist of all!

I believe this illustrates God’s work in our marriages and lives. Our marriages have temporarily been removed from us so that God has a new canvas on which to work. He has a vision and never for one moment is a stroke out of place…He knows exactly what He is doing. Sometimes we see positive strokes where we clearly witness the hand of God; only for them to become “smudged,” creating confusion in us because we can’t conceive of the smudges being part of God’s master plan. And honestly, if we look at our marriages during this time of reconstruction, they just look messy; not like beautiful artwork at all, but He is not finished yet. The comparison of the two sides of the painting is obvious. God starts His work with standers first; forming us into new images of His making that are pleasing to Him. And THEN he works on our spouses, returning to us to further refine us, and then back to our spouse and so on, finally bridging and blending the two sides together. And sometimes we cannot see anything God is doing. But we shouldn’t become frustrated; we should just realize that our view is only temporarily blocked. Although we can’t see; He is still working and the smartest thing we can do is trust the Artist and leave it in His hands, and return to our praise and worship.

After I took my attention off the artist and placed it back on my worship, the time passed quicker than I thought and before I knew it, the artist was finished and was standing proudly next to his creation. Words cannot even describe the beauty of it. The colors were perfect; every line and smudge intentional and purposeful. On the left, the side where he first began his work, was a drawing of Jesus on the cross; our sin paid for through His sacrifice. Likewise, our marriage restoration starts at the foot of the cross. The right side held a drawing of Jesus in His glory; resurrected and lifted high. And in the same way, our journey of marriage restoration will end with the focus on Christ and God getting all the glory!

I am no artist, so I felt a touch of awe, watching a blank canvas emerge into a work of art. Thank goodness, it never entered my mind to march up to the front and grab some of the colors and start to do my own work on the canvas. I would have ruined the whole thing! So, as a stander, I will remember what I experienced today and what I learned. I thank God for pointing out to me that He is at work and is creating something more beautiful in me, in my husband, in our marriage and in our family than any earthly artist ever could!

(Note from Linda: This powerful Marriage Restoration Testimony was shared on the private FAM Fellowship website over the weekend, and since it has so many powerful and VITALLY IMPORTANT messages for every man and woman standing for marriage restoration, I want to share it here as well. When I talked to Nik after she posted this, I was really struck by something she reminded me of from our first conversation; which she said had a tremendous impact on her and that it came to her mind over and over again. Her husband apparently believed that there was nothing wrong with indulging in casual sexual relationships and that she shouldn’t have a problem with that or be offended by it…and that despite that he also professed and acted as if he had a strong relationship with the Lord. Needless to say, Nik did have a problem with that and was quite upset and confused. She ended up asking him to leave and then proceeded to do all she could to “straighten him out.” Of course, as
we all know, that doesn’t work, which just made her angrier and even more frustrated. So I urged her to focus a lot more on prayer, trusting that God could do what she couldn’t do and told her that her behavior and attitude toward her husband was like trying to clean a fish before catching it. When we talk about unconditional love, it really does have to be UNCONDITIONAL; as demonstrated so powerfully in Romans 5:8, which says…But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. And as we’re told in Proverbs 19:22…What a man desires is unfailing love…. So Nik focused on letting the Lord do the work that had to be done in her during the time of no contact with her husband and trusted that God would do what needed to be done in him. I was especially touched and impressed by how she COVERED him when he was about to make an excuse about why he couldn’t join her and their son that day—she REALLY let him go and GOD honored and blessed her faith and humility and moved SUPERNATURALLY in her husband’s heart! She really did learn and understand the SUPERNATURAL POWER AND PROMISE of humility (1 Peter 5:5-8), obedience (Luke 6:46-49 and John 14:23) and faith (John 15:7Matthew 9:19 and Hebrews 10:38 and Hebrews 11:6)! Nik also shared in a lot more detail what she had to do to overcome her flesh to learn humility, obedience and to walk in faith, which she has promised to share more about in an upcoming post, and I’ll share that here as well when she does, because it is in the DOING of what God’s Word teaches that we find the hope and victory it promises! So read Nik’s powerful Restored Marriage Testimony and take the valuable lessons she learned to heart, because what God does for one, He WILL do for all and when we just learn as Nik did to STAY humble, STAY obedient and STAY in faith, we will indeed be blessed and encouraged beyond belief!)

*****
Hi FAMM Family!

It is with great joy in my heart and praise in my mouth that I write this post and share my praise and testimony. I am so encouraged and thankful for the blessings that God has bestowed on my family. I joke a bit when I tell people that it takes four ministers to counsel me each week, but for the past ten months that has been my reality because I was so consumed by disappointment, hurt and anger that I had to CONSTANTLY combat it with the Word of God.

When my husband and I separated, things were so bad that our pride made us both feel that silence and no contact with each other was the best approach, and we went six months without a word to each other. As time went on, I prayed diligently that God would soften my heart and give me the courage to continue to stand for my marriage. And I had absolutely no one to rely on except the wonderful Seeds Of Faith posts and your praise and restored marriage testimonies. They were (and still are) so reassuring that God still sits on the throne! And no one can deliver from His righteous hand and no one can cancel the work He performs (Isaiah 43:13)!

While getting ready for church a few months back, I heard Joel Osteen teaching a message on being closer than you think and the bells chimed! He gave an example of climbing a mountain for sport, and the closer he came to the top, the more difficult the climb got. But just as he was about to give up, a man who was heading down the mountain said five simple words to him that really helped…”You’re closer than you think!” I held on to that message, and planted that seed in my heart. After all, Zechariah 9:12 tells us to return to our stand and be prisoners of hope because God will restore us double. And it’s important for all of us to realize and confirm that God is not a respecter of persons. If He can restore one marriage, He can restore them all. We must simply humble ourselves to His authority and stand in obedience!! So stay in faith!!

Each day I could feel my anger dissipate and my heart soften towards my husband. And back in January, I was sowing seed into a ministry when I felt God telling me to make the gift in both my husband’s and my name. Even though I laughed a bit and wondered what for; I was obedient. And two weeks later my husband sent me a text message, saying to contact him if I needed anything. We hadn’t spoken in 4 months and I didn’t recognize the number, so I thought it was a wrong number. But God kept pressing on my heart that it was my husband; yet I never responded to the text message. Then about three weeks later, I sent him an email message regarding our son, and within an hour, he responded. We made plans for him to visit our son, but he didn’t show. I knew the enemy would have me reclaim my anger, but I praised God and confirmed that our next meeting would go as planned and be all the more powerful instead! Then one week later, I called him at work and told him that I would be out his way visiting my in-laws if he wanted to drop by. And I didn’t even mention the prior meeting we had arranged, which meant nothing to me because I already knew God was at work. When we go from silence to speaking, we KNOW it’s GOD! He started to give me excuses about why he couldn’t make it, so I stopped him and told him kindly that we would love to see him but totally understood if he couldn’t make it. I actually heard him exhale and could swear I heard him smile. It’s funny because God had already revealed to me how the day would go, so I didn’t even bat an eye when he started to decline my invitation. I know God doesn’t give us desires in our hearts unless he plans to bring them forth, and I knew that in and of myself, I could not repair or restore my marriage.

My husband ended up taking a half day off from work to spend the day with us and we have been together ever since!!! So our family was restored on March 6, 2009! And if you could read the notes in my Bible, you would see that I declared the enemy defeated on June 19, 2008!!! But it took nine months for my declaration to be made manifest because of my pride! So please trust me on that one! It’s only by God’s grace and my trust in Him, that my family is restored. I was ready to give up, but His ways are not our ways!! If God tells us to stand, then that’s what we do! No matter what things look like or feel like…and no matter who stands with us! God is with us, so who can be against us (Romans 8:31)?

As soon as I put away my pride, hurt and anger, God moved in my life! My barriers were blocking my blessings. And Every event God has spoken to me about has come to pass in these past few months and my total trust is in Him!! Praise God! So I stand committed to my full and complete restoration. I know that what God has joined together NO MAN can put asunder (Mark 10:9)! And I know that He will complete the work He has begun in us (Philippians 1:6)! And we are commanded to set aside old habits, happenings and hurts (Isaiah 43:18)!

Standing alone for any cause can be a very lonely time and experience, and the world will count us out; BUT it’s not over until GOD says it’s over! The scars can sting, but they can’t destroy us. Praise be to God! One day last November, I actually heard someone refer to me as my husband’s “ex-wife”…which I thought was possible since I didn’t respond to the divorce papers I was served with; I just threw them in the trash because I knew that based on God’s promises to me, that’s all they were! But I learned that the enemy is CONSTANTLY seeking to devour and cast doubt in our minds. And unless we’re CONSTANTLY upholding the shield of faith, we will get weary and knocked down. So we have to stay encouraged and stay in faith!! If God told us to stand for our marriages, then that’s what we are to do until He tells us otherwise…even when we don’t want to, even when we are tired and most especially, even when we feel like giving up! And Linda can definitely attest to the fact that I’m speaking from experience!

So be a prisoner of hope, stay humbled and stay in faith!!! I love you and pray for all of us! OUR GOD IS STILL ON THE THRONE!!! Linda, please move us to the Restored Marriage list! Praise be to God!!!

I was really touch by the following message from Glenn Jackson, which I just read as I once again attempt to “clean out” my inbox. As I’ve shared in several recent conversations with FAM Fellowship members, I am really concerned about the consequences and harm done by what I often refer to as “the watered down version of God’s Word.” And Glenn so perfectly expressed the concern of my heart when He wrote (my emphasis added): “In their failure to “allow” Him - by the power of the Holy Spirit - to bring them to the place wherein they have learned to continually acknowledge HIM in ALL of their ways, many have been used by Satan and his forces to establish an entire “network” of so-called Christian service - but, in reality, it is a “service” and relationship that DOES NOT HAVE its origin in Christ - the Anointed One and His Anointing. What this has produced is a spirit of mass confusion where the “world” is concerned - as they look out upon the church. This strategy of the Evil One, alone, is responsible for great numbers remaining in heavy bondage to the deep darkness that is increasing day by day in the world.” So I encourage everyone to thoughtfully read and meditate on this powerful message and truly understand why it is SO important for all of us to get our hearts right with the Lord, TRULY HUMBLING OURSELVES UNDER HIS MIGHTY HAND (1 Peter 5:5-8), so that He can use us for His highest purposes as we stand on the power and promise of His Word against the gates of hell for the full and complete restoration of our marriages and families; both for our good and His glory! And when we do that, we won’t even be able to contain the blessings and encouragement we will receive in return!

*****
THE LIFE OF FAITH AND THE GLORIOUS CHURCH - 2009
APRIL 7TH
“MANY HAVE BEEN USED BY SATAN AND HIS FORCES TO ESTABLISH AN ENTIRE NETWORK OF SO-CALLED CHRISTIAN SERVICE - BUT, IN REALITY, IT IS A SERVICE AND RELATIONSHIP THAT DOES NOT HAVE ITS ORIGIN IN CHRIST”
….”Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight”…. Proverbs 3:5-6 NASB

How the heart of the Father is “robbed” [of the intimate fellowship He so desires] by the continual adherence of many of His children to a spirit of self-reliance [the leaning of one upon their own darkened understanding through ANY form of agreement with the lies of the Evil One]. In their failure to “allow” Him - by the power of the Holy Spirit - to bring them to the place wherein they have learned to continually acknowledge HIM in ALL of their ways, many have been used by Satan and his forces to establish an entire “network” of so-called Christian service - but, in reality, it is a “service” and relationship that DOES NOT HAVE its origin in Christ - the Anointed One and His Anointing. What this has produced is a spirit of mass confusion where the “world” is concerned - as they look out upon the church. This strategy of the Evil One, alone, is responsible for great numbers remaining in heavy bondage to the deep darkness that is increasing day by day in the world. There is only one possible solution to this problem and that is the advent of a true and Glorious Church - a Church that is both possessed and ordered by the Holy Spirit. A Church - both individually and corporately - where Christ is truly ALL in ALL [Ephesians 1:17-23]!

“THERE ARE MANY IN THE CHURCH WHOSE LIVES REMAIN DEVOID OF LIBERTY”
There are still many who are totally unaware of the intense [fiery] and absolute judgement of God that is about to come forth to an even greater degree in the midst of His people [1 Corinthians 3:10-15]. There can only be one reason for this, and that is a failure of the child of God to enter into - and abide in - the perfect fellowship daily in the “inner chamber” that is required of them by their loving Father. In these days, ALL that has its origin apart from Christ is going to be exposed! Even now, there are many in the church whose lives remain devoid of “liberty” ["where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty"]
[2 Corinthians 3:17] and, thus, they are “powerless” to escape the horrendous consequences that they have sown to in their unbelief and religious exercise. There are others whose ministries are crumbling around them. This is not a result of Satan’s attack, for it is certain that they were already in his control and being used by him to keep many children of God far below the fullness of their precious inheritance in Christ. This “crumbling” is the perfect result of a holy God humbling ALL that has sought to exalt itself above His holy Word [Will]!

“IN THIS ARMY NO “TREACHERY” WILL BE FOUND - OR ANY OTHER HEART-ATTITUDE OR MIND-SET THAT PROMOTES THE SELF-XALTATION AND SELF-AGENDA THAT ARE BOTH AN AFFRONT TO THE PRECIOUS BLOOD OF JESUS AND THE HEART OF A PERFECT AND HOLY FATHER”
It is the heart of the Father for each and every one of His children to enter into His presence daily in order that His Glorious light might continually shine forth in their heart - both unearthing and consuming any “ground” that is at enmity with His precious Wisdom and tender love. If one continues on wilfully in their “religious exercise” in these days they will indeed fall FAR short of the glorious “Kingdom-position” that the Father has for them, and they will surely be found “unfit” to carry the banner of truth and righteousness and love that will go before His glorious Army [Joel 2:1-13] in this final battle of the Church Age. In this Army no “treachery” will be found - or any other heart-attitude or mind-set that promotes the self-exaltation and self-agenda that are both an affront to the precious Blood of Jesus and the heart of a perfect and holy Father. Let us be found true, faithful and trustworthy to the highest purposes of the Kingdom in these most glorious days. Let us be diligent to acknowledge the Father and His Word in ALL of our ways. For it is in this way - and this way alone - that we will have the divine assurance in our heart that we are in the center of the Father’s will - perfectly motivated by His love in ALL things.

Related Scriptures: Isaiah 60:2; John 15:5; 1 Peter 4:17; Matthew 5:48; Matthew 6:33; 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
Jesus Is Lord Ministries Vertical

*****
You can read Glenn’s messages online or sign up to receive them by email daily on his website.

“Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD.” Psalm 150:6

As day was breaking this morning I heard a little bird outside my window chirping loudly. I wondered what he was “saying”. Of course, I can’t interpret “bird language” but I have a feeling that he wasn’t complaining about how it has turned off cold. I don’t think he was bemoaning the state of the economy. I don’t think he was fearfully wondering where his next meal was coming from. I don’t think he was singing a song of gloom, despair, worry or fear.

I believe he was singing a song of praise- praise to God for giving him a new day, for watching over him and taking care of him. May I remind you this morning that the birds don’t have jobs, they don’t have grocery stores, they don’t live in heated and cooled houses, they live in nests, they catch bugs and dig for worms, yet they have everything that they need. How? Because there is a God above who feeds them and attends to all their needs. This God is our heavenly Father. So may I remind you also that if He cares so much for the birds that He feeds them every day, doesn’t He care for you more? Aren’t you more valuable to Him than they are? So why are you singing the song of worry? Why is your conversation one of fear? Why are you complaining? Why aren’t you speaking in faith? Why aren’t your words filled with praise?

“Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?” (Matthew 6:25-26)
“Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore:
ye are of more value than many sparrows.” (Luke 12:6-7)

Have a great day. If God doesn’t forsake the birds’ needs, if He takes care of them, if He provides for them, won’t He do the same for you… and much more?

*****
Coffee Break is a morning devotional written by Lorraine Ezell, and available online and sent by email free of charge for the asking from About the Master’s Business Ministry, Inc.
So please feel free to call Lorraine at (601) 833-5278 or E-mail her at [email protected]
And you can visit her on the web at MastersBusiness.org.

We greatly appreciate and thank Lorraine for her permission to share and reprint her Coffee Break devotionals here to bless and encourage our visitors!

(Note from Linda: The FAM Fellowship members are again blessed by a powerful and encouraging message and After Marriage Restoration testimony from Karla, and I really appreciate her permission to share it here as well because I know many men and women standing for marriage restoration will be blessed by it too. When we consider Genesis 50:20, Romans 8:28 and 1 Thessalonians 5:18, there is no way to deny that God is indeed good ALL the time and that no matter what we hear or see, with God it is ALWAYS good! So study and memorize those verses and be blessed and encouraged because they cover it ALL!)

*****
Hi FAMM Family! I apologize for how long it’s been since I last posted, but my husband and I have been spending time catching up on home projects that were left undone for eight months. And we’ve been spending a lot of time with the kids as a family because we want to make sure they feel secure after all of our separations. We’ve also been spending a lot of time just catching up since we spent the last three years in and out of separations, until we finally got our act together and trusted God with our marriage!

The title of this post is something we say in church each Sunday when we “pass the peace” and our pastor even makes us repeat it if we are not enthusiastic enough about it. In fact, he often keeps it up until we are yelling it! And it happens to be what I have taken away from my three year journey to marriage restoration, because God was good…ALL the time! He was good when things went bad; He was good when I made mistakes; He was good when my world was crumbling around me; He was good when I didn’t trust Him; He was good when I whined, grumbled, and complained before I let go; and He was good even when I blamed Him for my marriage not being restored when I wanted it restored. God was good, and is good…ALL the time!

In the NIV study bible, “good” is referenced one hundred twenty-three times, so I want to share some of them here. One of the ones we hear the most here at FAMM is Romans 8:28, which says…And we know that in all things God works for the GOOD of those who love Him who have been called according to His purpose. And God certainly worked everything out for my good during my stand for the restoration of my marriage! But He did not restore my marriage until He knew I completely and fully trusted Him, and there was no fooling Him!

In the past, I had not trusted Him with my marriage, so I took matters into my own hands and tried to fix myself, my husband, and my marriage because I simply didn’t trust Him or His timing. Yet He waited patiently for me to become patient with Him during my stand, which I finally did. God is good…ALL the time!

Romans 12:2 tells us…Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His GOOD, pleasing, and perfect will. This passage of scripture speaks volumes about what went on in my heart and mind during my stand. Prior to really standing for my marriage, I wasn’t conforming to the pattern of this world because I was saved and had a relationship with Jesus. However, I was not transformed because my mind had not been renewed. I knew something in me needed to change and I even knew that I needed to trust God; but I just couldn’t give Him my marriage, which I probably treasured even more than Him. Fortunately, I came to a place during my last separation when I knew it was now or never…do or die, and I spent a weekend in silence and weeping. And that’s when He spoke to me, and I knew that this was it; that I was going to trust Him and let go of my husband and marriage or continue doing things my way and getting my own disappointing results. I knew my marriage hung in the balance that day, so I made the life-altering decision to lay my marriage, and my husband, who I loved and missed more than anything, at His feet. I literally felt like I was physically presenting a gift of my trust to God at the altar by giving Him what mattered to me the most. And on that day, I was transformed and the next day, I awoke with a renewed mind and a peace beyond comprehension. And I’ll always praise and thank God for what He did with what I gave Him!!! He gave my husband and marriage back to me!!! But He didn’t give them back to me when I wanted them or even when I really felt that I needed them; He gave them back to me when it was the right time to perfect HIS plan and when He knew that I was ready. And not only did He give them back to me; He gave them back to me in ways I had never dreamed of or thought possible. God is good…ALL the time!

Mark 1:15 says…‘The time has come,’” he said. ‘The kingdom of God is near. Repent and believe the GOOD news.’ I have read this verse before, but as I read it again now while researching scriptures, it took on a whole new meaning. There were times during my stand when I had to “repent and believe the good news” that God was going to restore my marriage. Perhaps the same thing has happened to some of you as well; because I would be standing strong and then the wind of unexpected adversity would come and I would start to sway a bit. I even fell flat on my face a few times, and one of those times was when I knew that the time had come…so I had to repent and believe the good news that God would restore my marriage…AND HE DID!!! God is good…ALL the time!

Hebrews 12:10 says…Our fathers disciplined us for awhile as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our GOOD, that we may share in His holiness. It’s important to include Hebrews 12:11 here as well, because it says…No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. These are very powerful verses of scripture for me, because there was a time that I felt I was being punished by God and that I didn’t deserve to have my marriage restored. But God loves us, and He wants nothing but good for us. I can certainly say that I went through my time of discipline, and now I have a harvest of peace! When I finally made the choice to trust God, the peace that came into my heart is something I wouldn’t trade for anything. So I now have a mantra that I live by, which is “Peace at all cost.” And I’m thankful and forever blessed by the harvest of peace I have received. So when we feel that we are being disciplined, may our hearts always be filled with hope, because our harvest is coming! God is good…ALL the time!

The last verse I want to share is Galatians 6:9, which reminds us…Let us not become weary in doing GOOD, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Amen! And there’s a lot for us in this verse when we consider how it applies to standing for our marriages.
Let us not become weary in doing good…when we are standing for our marriages, we are in the fight of our lives. And doing good is doing GOD’S will, and NOT what everyone else tells us to do. And that’s something I learned the hard way.
for at the proper time…the proper time is His time, and not our time. His time is not when an exact amount of time has passed; nor when too much time has passed. It is HIS time! But I really struggled so very much with getting that. So know that God is going to restore your marriage, and He does not discriminate and restore marriages quicker where children are involved; He does not restore marriages because of a wedding anniversary or any dates that we feel are important; and He does not restore one marriage over another because He plays favorites. But we do not get to determine what the “proper time” is, and if we try, we will just be disappointed. In my case, the “proper time” was after I had truly and completely laid my marriage and husband at His feet, and when He knew I was ready.
we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Let me say that last part again…IF WE DO NOT GIVE UP! If, and ONLY IF we do not give up. There might well be days when you feel like giving up, and I was there more times than I care to disclose, but let this be the last day you feel that way. God is a God of healing and restoration and He promises us right here in this part of the verse that we WILL reap a harvest IF we DON’T give up! He did not say we MIGHT reap a harvest; He said we WILL reap a harvest IF we don’t give up! And by the grace of God, I am walking proof of that because I chose not to give up and I have been blessed with a most bountiful harvest!!! So KNOW that God’s most abundant and blessed harvest awaits each of you, fellow standers!!! And I can’t wait to rejoice with you when they manifest! God is good…ALL the time!

Love and Blessings,
Karla

Last Friday’s devotional by Charles Stanley, From the Bottom Up, which one of the FAM members shared in printed form on the private site Friday morning, was perfectly timed in light of recent conversations with other FAM members.. And as God is always so faithful to do, it also perfectly tied in with recent discussion and posts on the private site about doubt and discouragement and truly trusting God.

Perhaps one of the most surprising discoveries I’ve made over the past few years in marriage restoration ministry is that Christian men and women are actually afraid to wholeheartedly put their trust in God because they are afraid of how they will react if He lets them down and they don’t see the manifestation of the restored marriages they are standing for. But as Dr. Stanley’s message points out, we will only be a lot worse off if we give up on God and resist putting our complete and unreserved faith and trust in Him, which only makes our situations a lot more hopeless and not in any way better. After all, if we give up on God, what hope of marriage restoration do we have? And I can certainly attest to the fact that based on what I have been blessed to witness in the restoration of dozens of marriages; those in our ministry who have been blessed with the manifestation of the power and promise of God’s Word in their lives and marriages have been those who refused to give up on Him and refused to believe what they saw and heard over what His Word declares. And it’s no wonder that the common denominator most apparent in the people who refuse to give up on God is the time spent in God’s Word and how much of it they have retained and buried deep down into their hearts, especially since Jesus promised in John 15:7…If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. And that just affirms the VITAL significance of what Romans 10:17 reveals…Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ. So if we question the importance of faith as we stand for the restoration of our marriages, we must not understand what Jesus meant when He declared that it will be done to us according to our faith (Matthew 9:29)! But the high cost of not KNOWING and REMEMBERING the Word of God is that we are then fighting a losing battle because we won’t even recognize arguments and pretensions setting themselves up against the knowledge of God; much less be able to demolish the enemy’s strongholds by taking thoughts contrary to the Word of God captive and making them obedient to Jesus Christ/the Word (2 Corinthians 10:3-6 and John 1:14).

So the next time the devil comes to steal, kill and destroy our righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit and the word of our testimony (John 10:10, Romans 14:17 and Revelation 12:10-11), and we’re tempted to give up on God, we really have to seriously consider what’s left because when we understand the cost of NOT fully trusting God and putting our faith and hope in Him to do ALL that His Word declares, we will realize that we have no other choice if we want to see His glory and His Word in all its power and promise manifested in our lives and marriages. Yet we will indeed be blessed and encouraged if we recognize that we are JUSTIFIED THROUGH FAITH, and thus CHOOSE to PERSEVERE and STAND in the GRACE of our Lord, as we put our HOPE IN HIM AND HIS WORD instead of giving up, because we will NOT BE DISAPPOINTED and we will experience PEACE and REJOICE as promised in Romans 5:1-5, which says…Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. And let us NEVER forget that God sent the Holy Spirit to SEAL the deal and to GUARANTEE our hope and inheritance in Christ (Ephesians 1:13-14), which we know is righteousness, peace, joy and abundant life!!! But if we don’t stand in FAITH and put our hope in the power and promise of God’s Word and His faithfulness and power to bring it ALL to pass (Numbers 23:19, Isaiah 46:10-11 and Isaiah 55:10-11), then we have NO guarantees and NOTHING left! So NEVER give up on God and get ready to be blessed and encouraged as you put your hope in Him!

(Note from Linda: The following was posted by Mark on the private website this morning, and since it is something I know many visitors to our public website can relate to and are sure to be blessed by as well as the FAM Fellowhship members, I appreciate mark’s permission to share anything he posts here as well. And as is ALWAYS the case, it’s almost hard to believe how well it ties in with so many other posts and conversations in the ministry over the past few days! But that’s just the way God is—always faithful and ever so powerful! So understand that the Lord is ALWAYS ready and able to lift us up and give us victory if we will just turn to HIM and give it ALL to Him; humble ourselves under His mighty hand (1 Peter 5:5-6), and we will indeed be blessed and encouraged beyond belief because HE WILL LIFT US UP IN DUE TIME!)

*****
Good Morning Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

It has been a couple of weeks since I last posted, and I have been traveling quite a bit and unfortunately not staying as involved in the ministry and word as I would like to be. And as a result, I stumbled and had myself one big old “pity party” yesterday. In spite of all the blessings and revelations, I allowed myself to be attacked by pride and frustration over something minor, and since I did not take those thoughts captive, they had me questioning my sanity, faith and stand. I took my eyes off Jesus and focused on the storm and water around me instead; just as Peter did after he stepped out of the boat. And all of that after the amazing fact that last week, my wife told me “I have come to realize that I really need to make God more a part of my life.”

However, I am not writing this to focus on how I stumbled. Instead, I want to share praises and encouragement with you all; praises for the God who gives and takes away, praises for each trial I face, and for the growth I experience as a result. God has blessed me in so many ways this past year because of our separation, and I’ve seen him move and soften my wife’s heart as well as mine. He has restored and renewed my faith and walk with Him and He has opened my eyes and heart to the wonder of His glory.

We will all stumble on occasion; no matter how hard we try, we are still human. As James 3:2 says…We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check. And Daniel 11: 35 says…Some of the wise will stumble, so that they may be refined, purified and made spotless until the time of the end, for it will still come at the appointed time. Even if we stumble at times, how we get up is what is most important to God. So we can either be defeated by our trials or moments when we lack faith or we can grow from them and invest more faith in our Father. The word tells us that if we turn to God, He will uphold us; just as Jesus rescued Peter, so shall it be for us. As Proverbs 24:16 declares…for though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again, but the wicked are brought down by calamity. And then Psalm 37:23-24 promises…If the LORD delights in a man’s way, he makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with his hand.

So we must remain strong in Christ Jesus and keep our focus on Him and only Him because the more we do that, the less we will stumble. However, if we are fainthearted, we cannot take much because everything has to be a certain way or we give up and quit, and we get discouraged and depressed quickly. But what happens if our hearts fail? We can either decide that we can’t do this…it’s just too hard…or we can turn to God who gives us the strength we need to overcome ANYTHING the devil sends our way. Regrettably, I have given up on many things in the past because they were too hard. But our faithfulness in the little things reveals if we are really ready to receive the greater things God wants to give us. And when we put our trust, faith and confidence in God and Him alone, the victory is ours. As Deuteronomy 20: 1-4 says…When you go to war against your enemies and see horses and chariots and an army greater than yours, do not be afraid of them, because the LORD your God, who brought you up out of Egypt, will be with you. When you are about to go into battle, the priest shall come forward and address the army He shall say: “Hear, O Israel, today you are going into battle against your enemies. Do not be fainthearted or afraid; do not be terrified or give way to panic before them. For the LORD your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory. And 2 Chronicles 20:17 says…You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the LORD will give you, O Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the LORD will be with you.’

The Lord is with us!! So let’s continue to praise and put our trust in God, for He will give us the strength and wisdom to persevere. We can not lean on others; we must lean on God and lean on His word. And we have to keep our eyes on Him and the abundance of blessings He has given us. Faith is not believing that God can; it is believing that He will!!

Faith, Hope, Love and Peace to all of you!

Something that really touches my heart and blesses me so much is seeing how the Lord works when FAM Fellowship members reach out to each other in their time of need and share how God has worked in their lives to bring them comfort and His victory when they were in the same place earlier in their stand for marriage restoration. And it’s been a real blessing to see that the men are getting so much more involved in the fellowship! In fact, over the past couple of weeks, the last seven new members in the fellowship have all been men, which is a definite record! So we look forward to seeing their names added to our Restored Marriage list in the near future as the Lord continues working in their hearts and marriages!

Since I know the response from one of our members to another this morning speaks to so many other men standing for marriage restoration, I want to share it here (with names omitted for obvious reasons) with the hope and prayer that it will speak to someone and be a great source of blessing and encouragement as you learn to stand on the power and promise of God’s Word and to rely on HIM and HIM ALONE for the full and complete restoration of your marriages and families. When we learn to truly let go and give EVERYTHING to the God Who loves us and our spouses so much, we will never be disappointed and we can’t lose! So take heed to the godly counsel in the following response from the private FAM Fellowship site and be blessed and encouraged!

*****
MNO, heed the above advice and what God tells us in His Word. We have to support, affirm, validate and encourage our spouses. And we cannot do that when we are caught up in our selfishness and self-pity. I spent too much time wallowing in my own misery and not understanding how my wife could hurt me so much and reject me and not feel badly about it! But I now understand that I was not acknowledging her feelings and reality any more than she was mine. Even though I had admitted the problems I brought to our marriage, I was still not listening to what she was telling me. I was the best husband I knew how to be and was focused on that, and that it wasn’t my fault. But when I stopped blaming her, and started looking at myself instead of accepting the devil’s condemnation, I was able to focus on God. He had plans to change the person I was into the person He intended me to be from the beginning, but it unfortunately took this circumstance of brokenness to get me to surrender to Him; thank God! Trust me, I had plenty for God to change in me without worry about how He needed to change my wife. I did not have the anger issues that some have, but I certainly had other deep seeded strongholds that I needed to be set free from. But God is awesome; never leaving or forsaking us!

When God puts the desire in our hearts to stand for our marriages, it is not about having our marriage restored; it is about making us into the Christ-like husband His Word calls us to be. We have to be willing and humbled to give Him 100% so we can give our wives 100% regardless of what we are getting in return. When they are able to see Jesus in us, they will desire what we have and God will soften and change their hearts to desire Him, which is most important. And then as they surrender their hearts to Jesus, He will put the desire in them to be obedient and trust Him and then they will have the desire to have their marriage restored. It will be a God thing.

So I pray that you will let Jesus change you. There is nothing on earth that you can do aside from God that will change your wife’s mind. It will be her seeing Jesus in you that will move her heart towards you. She has been wounded and healing has to take place. As we wait for that healing to happen, we must give everything we have to God so He can make us into the Godly husbands, fathers, and men that by His grace and mercy, He desires for us to become.

There is no doubt that God wants marriages restored and families healed. Yet we must also realize that He wants us to live life abundantly and that can only be done by following Him and letting the Holy Spirit work in us. God loves our wives more than we do, and He loves us. None of us will ever hurt or suffer more than He did when He sent Jesus to suffer and die for our sins. By standing for our marriages, we have the opportunity to show the world that we have victory in Jesus as we trust and obey Him, and that God is who He says He is and will do what He says He will do. God is the truth, the way and the life and we have the privilege of proving that to the world.

So, hang in there and let go, and let God bless you both by giving you the marriage He intended for you in the first place.

As we often say in the ministry, we’ve definitely had a recurring theme for the past few days, and it’s been recognizing just how great and mighty our awesome God is! It’s really sad how little most Christians know and understand about the greatness and omnipotent power of our ALMIGHTY God, and even more so for those who need a move of His mighty hand for the restoration of their marriages or any other miracle of SUPERNATURAL proportion! So I really appreciated a post by one of the FAM Fellowship members late Thursday night and planned to share it here Friday, even though I never had time to get it posted. Then as I often am, Friday morning I was in total awe of God’s faithfulness to confirm the message He obviously wanted to get across when I saw what the Lord put on Lorraine’s heart to share in her Coffee Break devotion that morning! So I want to share both messages here now and encourage everyone to do WHATEVER IT TAKES to REALLY get to know and understand the majesty and power of our great and mighty God, which ONLY comes by seriously reading and meditating on His Word! And there’s absolutely NOTHING else we can do that would bless and encourage us more than gaining the revelation knowledge of God that comes through reading and discerning His Word!!!

Our God is Awesome! By Teresa in Arizona

Hello FAMM Family…and welcome to all of our new members!!!

I was reading the bible the other day and decided to read Ezekiel. And though I’m not sure why I picked that, I’m sure I was led there. As I read the first chapter about the vision Ezekiel saw, I began to cry because I suddenly had a sense of how big our God is, which I encourage everyone to read. And a few things really hit me as I read the last verse, Ezekiel 1:28, where it says…Like the appearance of a rainbow in a cloud on a rainy day, so was the appearance of the brightness all around it. This was the appearance of the likeness of the Glory of the Lord. So when I saw it, I fell on my face, and I heard a voice of One speaking. The Glory of God made Ezekiel fall on his face, and we see that in many places in scripture, which makes me realize that we don’t really understand the “greatness” of the God we serve…His presence makes people fall on their faces!!! Then in Ezekiel 2:1-2, it says… And He said to me, “Son of man, stand on your feet, and I will speak to you.” Then the Spirit entered me when He spoke to me, and SET ME ON MY FEET; and I heard Him who spoke to me. God will set us on our feet and through the power of the Holy Spirit, we will hear Him when He speaks. And that’s confirmed in Psalm 40:2 because it says He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.

Further along in Ezekiel 2:4-6, The Lord tells Ezekiel…The people to whom I am sending you are obstinate and stubborn. Say to them, ‘This is what the Sovereign LORD says.’ And whether they listen or fail to listen—for they are a rebellious house—they will know that a prophet has been among them. And you, son of man, do not be afraid of them or their words. Do not be afraid, though briers and thorns are all around you and you live among scorpions. Do not be afraid of what they say or terrified by them, though they are a rebellious house.
So when we say and do what God tells us to do, we are not to be afraid of what man says or thinks of us or our beliefs and we will be His light to others in any case!!!

In Ezekiel 3:1-4, it says…And he said to me, “Son of man, eat what is before you, eat this scroll; then go and speak to the house of Israel.” So I opened my mouth, and he gave me the scroll to eat. Then he said to me, “Son of man, eat this scroll I am giving you and fill your stomach with it.” So I ate it, and it tasted as sweet as honey in my mouth. He then said to me: “Son of man, go now to the house of Israel and speak my words to them. We have to “eat” and “digest” the word of the Lord so that will be what comes out of our mouths and then we can stand on His promises. It is like honey to our souls!!!

I love when the Holy Spirit brings God’s words to life and reveals their application in our lives. It is like strength being poured into us. Praise God that He has given us His living words!!! I was also reminded of something a pastor said at church a couple of weeks ago. He said that we probably have so many “wimpy Christians” because we think we serve a “wimpy Jesus.” Yet, when we read this passage and many others, we should come to the revelation that our God is the farthest thing from wimpy we can get. He is huge, powerful, awesome and mighty. Words cannot describe Him adequately, which is why humans fall to their faces in His presence, even without a word spoken from His mouth!!!

So when we begin to think that our situations are impossible; whether relationships, finances, emotional issues or whatever, we should go back to the word of God and read about WHO HE IS!!! These passages of scripture have really given me a glimpse and greater understanding of the great and mighty and wonderful God we serve. And I hope it encourages you as well. God Bless!

All Powerful God by Lorraine Ezell

“Far above all principality, and power, and might, and dominion, and every name that is named, not only in this world, but also in that which is to come.” Ephesians 1:21

A few days ago we talked about how that God is in control and more powerful than the most powerful people on earth. God has all power; He has absolute power, while man- regardless of the position he may hold- only has delegated power and authority that has been given to him by God.

This morning I want to remind you that not only does God have all power in earth but also in heaven. He has all power in the heavenly/spiritual realms as well. He doesn’t only have power over the “seen” world, He has power over the “unseen” world. His power is greater than that of the devil or any demon. His power is greater than the powers of sickness and disease. He is more powerful than depression, anxiety, worry and fear. He is greater than the harassing spirits that try to torment you with guilt and condemnation. He is more powerful than the enemy’s lies, accusations and confusion that he throws your way. He created all things by the power of His word, by the breath of His nostrils and by the thought in His mind. He is greater than anything! He alone has been highly exalted with a name that is above every other name. He alone sits at the right hand of the Majesty on high. He alone has all things under His feet. He alone is the Head. He alone has the title of King of kings and Lord of lords. He is the one that causes demons to tremble, mountains to skip like young lambs, the sun to hide it’s face because of His brilliant radiance, the ocean to roll back at His presence, even the winds and the waves of the sea obey Him.

He has power over anything and everything that is coming against you today. The devil is not more powerful- his schemes, devices and pits of destruction are not more powerful. Jesus defeated him at the cross. (Colossians 2:15) He totally disrobed him and stripped him of any power that he has over you. Jesus set the captives free and opened the prison doors to those who were bound. The grave could not hold Him. He rose victorious over death and the grave and that victory was gained not for Himself, but for us!!! His strong right arm got us the victory!!! So walk in that victory today because the All- Powerful God lives in you.

“Greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world.” (1 John 4:4)

Have a great day. Never forget WHO He is… the ALL POWERFUL GOD of heaven and of earth.

*****
Coffee Break is a morning devotional written by Lorraine Ezell, and available online and sent by email free of charge for the asking from About the Master’s Business Ministry, Inc.
So please feel free to call Lorraine at (601) 833-5278 or E-mail her at [email protected]
And you can visit her on the web at MastersBusiness.org.

We greatly appreciate and thank Lorraine for her permission to share and reprint her Coffee Break devotionals here to bless and encourage our visitors!

We’ve really been blessed to welcome a lot of new members to the FAMM family lately, because it’s always exciting to see how the Lord works in their hearts and lives and in the restoration of their marriages and families. And since we have so many new members and a lot of new visitors to the public website who are “new” to standing for marriage restoration, and likely struggling with a lot of the same issues, I want to address some of those issues because we ALL have to learn HOW to stand for marriage restoration according to God’s Word. Like everyone else, we ALL knew to stand LONG before we knew HOW to do it, so I encourage everyone new to standing for marriage restoration to go back into the archives of the public website (Seeds Of Faith posts) and the private site for our new FAM Fellowship members, because there’s an awful lot of information available on both sites about standing for our marriages the way God wants us to stand, which is ALWAYS according to HIS Word.

Since one of the first things we have to learn is that there isn’t anything WE can do about what our spouses are or are not doing, we have to give ALL of their issues to God and focus on what He wants to do in US. The work of marriage restoration is always done in the SUPERNATURAL and when we allow the Lord to work in us, we release His SUPERNATURAL power to work on our behalf as we stand in faith and obedience on the power and promise of His Word for the restoration of our marriages, and HE can and will change the hearts and minds of our spouses in that process. But we can’t and the more we try, the worse we make things. So read Letting Go and Being Spouses of Noble Character, for more about that. And read We Can’t Afford to Play the Blame Game, because when we do, we’re being disobedient to the Word and prideful…thinking we can do what God specifically declares HE will do is an attempt to elevate ourselves to His level, which is exactly what got Satan thrown out of heaven. And the Bible warns that pride goes before destruction (Proverbs 16:18); not to mention that God OPPOSES the proud (1 Peter 5:5-6). But HE gives grace to the humble and in due time lifts those who humble themselves under His mighty hand!

And it’s VERY important to understand that God does not want us to concern ourselves or take on dealing with anyone’s sin other than our own, which is abundantly clear when we read 2 Corinthians 10:6, Matthew 7:1-5, John 8:3-11 and Luke 18:9-14, where Jesus left no doubt about that based on what He taught in The Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector, which says: To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’
“But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’ “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.” Furthermore, this powerful passage of scripture makes it pretty obvious that God is not at ALL impressed or pleased with our prayers about SOMEONE ELSE’S sinfulness, which Jesus made abundantly clear when He very specifically taught how we should pray in Matthew 6:5-15.

So in addition to realizing that we can’t do anything to change our spouses, we also have to realize that God commands and expects us to forgive as HE forgives, and whether we like it or not or think it’s possible or not, that also means that we have to FORGET! So read God Commands Us To Forgive AND Forget, which is a previous Seeds Of Faith post dealing with that. Therefore we have to be very careful not to let unforgiveness become an obstacle to the restoration of our marriages, as shared in another SOF post, Avoiding Unforgiveness as an Obstacle to Marriage Restoration.

And even though it’s often very confusing when we get mixed signals from our spouses and can’t understand what’s going on, usually the result of their double mindedness, we can’t fall into the devil’s trap of trying to understand or explain our spouses’ behavior; particularly when it makes no sense! And we can’t forget that God very specifically instructs us to trust HIM with ALL of our hearts, NOT to lean to our own understanding, and to acknowledge HIM in ALL OF OUR WAYS (Proverbs 3:5-6). And even though that’s a huge temptation for all of us, we can’t give in to it, which is why it has often been the topic of previous SOF posts; such as Overcoming Confusion And Uncertainty and Avoiding the Pitfall of Leaning to our own Understanding.
We also need to be careful when it comes to questioning the salvation of our spouses because of apparent sin in their lives. After all, even though God Himself said that David was a man after His own heart, we know that David committed both adultery and murder. And if we fall into the trap of thinking that way, we ourselves are in danger because it’s ONLY by the grace of God that we are as we are, and not doing the very same things our spouses have done or are doing. And 1 Corinthians 10:12 clearly warns that we must be careful when we think WE are standing firm, because we ourselves are NOT incapable of falling. And in the eyes of God, our spouses’ sin and failure to heed God’s Word is no greater than ours; because to God, sin is sin and unless we are perfect, we should not be casting stones at others; especially our spouses because that is the kiss of death to marriage restoration.

So as we stand for marriage restoration, it’s very important to realize that we can’t experience the fullest blessings God wants to give us as long as we see ourselves as victims, which we obviously do as long as we continue to talk about our pain, hurt and our spouses’ mistakes and misdeeds and how much harm they have caused us…or even pat ourselves on the back about how far we’ve come because we’re better at “hiding” our pain and distress now. However, God is a lot more concerned with what’s in our hearts and we can’t EVER “hide” anything from Him. And when we truly learn to forgive and forget, we won’t remain so focused on our identity as victims, so read Deciding to Give up our identity as Victims, which should make that easier to understand. Therefore, may our hearts always be filled with love and compassion for our spouses as we release our pain and choose to be the victors Jesus died to make us. May we all focus on our many blessings and refuse to be the victims Satan wants us to be. And may every man and woman standing for marriage restoration know the peace of God that comes ONLY through the renewing of our minds, regardless of our circumstances, as written about in Peace Through The Renewing Of Our Minds. And we ALL must remember that God is NOT the author of confusion (1 Corinthians 14:33 NKJV). So when we do struggle with confusion, it’s important to realize that the devil is just coming to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10). And since we know that the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23), it’s obvious that ALL contrary feelings, thoughts, emotions and actions are not of God; therefore they are of the devil, and Jesus left no doubt about what the devil ALWAYS comes to do, so we have to take those thoughts captive and MAKE them obedient to Jesus Christ and the Word (2 Corinthians 10:3-5 and John 1:14)!

And while it’s very good that many of us have learned to control our reactions when our spouses say or do something to upset us, they know us well enough to see it in our eyes, body language or even hear it in the tone of our voices; which is why it is VITALLY important to allow the Holy Spirit to do the work God wants to do in OUR hearts. Then we can truly be the wives and husbands described in 1 Peter 3:1-12 and Ephesians 5:21-33, which we can be absolutely certain our spouses will find totally irresistible! So, as women, when we have a difficult time understanding how our husbands can be so disobedient to the Word of God, we should just read 1 Peter 3:1-6 again and just ask ourselves how obedient WE have been!” And then if we read Ephesians 5:22-24, most of us have to admit that we’ve actually been very disobedient; since it says…Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. And as difficult as it might be to understand or believe, nothing our husbands have done or are doing is any worse in the eyes of God than our failure as wives to respect, honor and submit to them, and our failure to do so has played a huge part in what they have done. As Proverbs 21:9 declares…Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. And that was deemed to be SO important that it was repeated again word for word in Proverbs 25:24! And the same thing was restated in Proverbs 19:13 and Proverbs 27:15! And something I’ve definitely learned in marriage restoration ministry is that there really isn’t ANY place a man would rather be than with his wife and kids; but there is ONE thing he wants more…and that’s PEACE!
And for husbands who struggle with thoughts of their wives’ disobedience to God, just read 1 Peter 3:7 again and honestly ask how obedient YOU have been. And then read Ephesians 5:25-33 and take measure of your own disobedience; because it says…Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. And when husbands learn to love and treat their wives as instructed here, there’s no doubt that their wives will respect and honor them. And BOTH husbands and wives have to read and put into practice the wise counsel of Ephesians 5:21, which says…Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. And as I have experienced personally, and as I know MANY of our members can also attest to, the greatest changes were made in me when I was TRULY grieved by the recognition of all of MY mistakes and the pain I caused my husband, which totally changed my perspective concerning everything he had done and who had actually done the greatest harm to our marriage. So I hope and pray that something shared here will help give new standers a different perspective and that we will let the Lord do the work He wants to do in US, which has to be done BEFORE He restores our marriages; otherwise we would just end up in the same place again, and that’s just not God’s way.

Finally, it’s VITALLY important to understand that one of the most harmful things we can do (and have most likely already done) to our spouses is run our mouths about everything they have done to hurt and wrong us to family and friends; which really hinders restoration. We are to COVER our spouses’ nakedness; not expose them and their short comings to all who will listen. Keep in mind that our spouses will have to face our families and friends and everything we have said about them when our marriages are restored. Yes, it’s difficult to resist the need to have the sympathy and comfort of family and friends, but at what cost? For more about covering our spouses’ nakedness with family, friends, and especially our children, read Covering Up His Nakedness, which was more specifically written for women before the guys joined the fellowship; but a lot of it applies to you guys too!

The really GOOD NEWS is that God is ALWAYS faithful to complete the good work He begins, and He has obviously begun a good work in those He has brought to FAMM and called to stand for marriage restoration, and He WILL be ever so faithful to complete it! He is using this time to mold and shape us into the spouses He wants us to be, and in the end, we will have much better, more joy filled and blessed marriages than ever before. There’s always a battle going on between our spouses’ heads and hearts, but their hearts will ultimately win if we just allow the Lord to do the work He wants to do in US first! And we are the ones most blessed when we do that because WE will have peace like we’ve never had before; not to mention that our wayward spouses are drawn to our peace, which pages of testimonies on the private site prove. So we are all honored to stand together as the Lord works to fully restore our marriages and families and to be a source of support and encouragement for each other along the way! And there’s no doubt that we will be blessed and encouraged beyond belief when we learn to stand for the restoration of our marriages according to the Word of God and for the glory of Jesus Christ, because GOD ALWAYS DOES WHATEVER IT TAKES to bring His Word and plan to pass (Isaiah 46:10-11 and Isaiah 55:10-11