Pride Is A MAJOR Hindrance To Marriage Restoration
Well, it’s certainly a mouthful to say that pride hinders marriage restoration, but if we’re honest, most of us have to admit that it was pride that caused a lot of the problems in our marriages in the first place. Most of us have to admit that there was some area in our marriage, where we didn’t think our husband was treating us right. Or we didn’t like something he was doing or not doing, or something he wanted us to do, and we let him know EXACTLY how we felt about it. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “I couldn’t let him treat me like a doormat.” or “I didn’t deserve to be treated that way.” That kind of attitude and the pride behind it is what causes trouble in many marriages, and it WILL keep them from being restored too. If we say we want marriage restoration but are not willing to examine ourselves for the changes we need to make, such as overcoming destructive attitudes of pride, we are not ready to stand for marriage restoration.
The Bible is so clear about how destructive pride is and how much the Lord hates it, and the lengths He will go to in order to destroy it. In fact, it’s more likely than not, that our marriages fell apart because of our pride and unwillingness to live with our husbands in accordance with His word as revealed in 1 peter 3:1-7, which says:
Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
Since Being submissive to our husbands, winning them over without a word, and recognizing that the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit is worth so much more than our outward beauty defies our prideful nature, many women won’t keep reading, and probably won’t experience marriage restoration either. But we can’t turn to the Lord and call on Him to help us, and say we’re putting our hope in Him, if we’re not willing to do things HIS way, instead of our own way or the world’s. So when we’re finally ready to examine ourselves and root out the pride that abides in most of us, reading the following verses can help us understand what a hindrance it is when we’re standing for the restoration of our marriages:
Proverbs 13:10
Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice.
Proverbs 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
Proverbs 29:23 (NKJV)
A man’s pride will bring him low, But the humble in spirit will retain honor.
Proverbs 16:18 (NKJV)
Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.
1 John 2:16 (NKJV)
For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world.
Mark 7:21-23 (NKJV)
For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a man.”
Daniel 5:20
But when his heart became arrogant and hardened with pride, he was deposed from his royal throne and stripped of his glory.
Jeremiah 49:16
The terror you inspire and the pride of your heart have deceived you, you who live in the clefts of the rocks, who occupy the heights of the hill. Though you build your nest as high as the eagle’s, from there I will bring you down,” declares the LORD.
Jeremiah 13:9-11
“This is what the LORD says: ‘In the same way I will ruin the pride of Judah and the great pride of Jerusalem. These wicked people, who refuse to listen to my words, who follow the stubbornness of their hearts and go after other gods to serve and worship them, will be like this belt—completely useless! For as a belt is bound around a man’s waist, so I bound the whole house of Israel and the whole house of Judah to me,’ declares the LORD, ‘to be my people for my renown and praise and honor. But they have not listened.’
Jeremiah 48:28-30
Abandon your towns and dwell among the rocks, you who live in Moab. Be like a dove that makes its nest at the mouth of a cave. “We have heard of Moab’s pride—her overweening pride and conceit, her pride and arrogance and the haughtiness of her heart. I know her insolence but it is futile,” declares the LORD, “and her boasts accomplish nothing.
Amos 6:8
The Sovereign LORD has sworn by himself—the LORD God Almighty declares: “I abhor the pride of Jacob and detest his fortresses; I will deliver up the city and everything in it.”
Ezekiel 7:9-10 (NKJV)
‘ My eye will not spare, Nor will I have pity; I will repay you according to your ways, And your abominations will be in your midst. Then you shall know that I am the LORD who strikes. ‘ Behold, the day! Behold, it has come! Doom has gone out; The rod has blossomed, Pride has budded.
Job 33:16-18
he may speak in their ears and terrify them with warnings, to turn man from wrongdoing and keep him from pride, to preserve his soul from the pit, his life from perishing by the sword.
2 Chronicles 32:26 (NKJV)
Then Hezekiah humbled himself for the pride of his heart, he and the inhabitants of Jerusalem, so that the wrath of the LORD did not come upon them in the days of Hezekiah.
As women standing for marriage restoration, we have to humble ourselves before the Lord and ask Him to deal with the pride in our hearts, and ask Him for the grace, wisdom and strength we need to humble ourselves by submitting to our husbands with the respect and honor our obedience to Him requires, as we see in Ephesians 5:22-27, which says:
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless..
Then when we demonstrate our trust and faith in the Lord with such obedience, we can rely on His awesome promise in Psalm 37:4-6, which says:
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.