Anyone standing for marriage restoration and prone to discouragement and feeling sorry for themselves, especially when adultery is involved, should readIsaiah 61:7 (AMP), which is one of my favorites because it says Instead of your [former] shame you shall have a twofold recompense; instead of dishonor and reproach [your people] shall rejoice in their portion. Therefore in their land they shall possess double [what they had forfeited]; everlasting joy shall be theirs. And it’s important to note that “in their land” means that we will have this here and now and that it is not something we have to wait until we get to heaven to experience. How sad it is that there are so many Christians walking around with sad faces and despairing attitudes, which certainly does NOTHING to glorify the Lord! It reminds me of the testimony posted by one of our FAM members who had a friend tell her that her rotten attitude certainly didn’t make her want to be a Christian; that it was in fact more likely to keep her from ever considering it. Thank God that was enough to get her attention and make her realize what a terrible witness she was being for the Lord! People are watching us and when we don’t live our lives in a way that gives them a reason to want to be a Christian, we are doing the devil’s work and not the Lords, so when you get discouraged, please read the whole chapter of Isaiah 61 (AMP), and believe these awesome promises from God. He’s not a liar and if you don’t believe the Lord WILL do what He promises in these verses, you are in effect calling Him a liar, because you are CHOOSING to believe the report from Satan over the word of God! Remember that you are the only Jesus some of the people in your life will ever meet, so make every effort to give Him a good reputation. This is especially important for all mothers and fathers; your children are watching you as you go through this trial in your life and they are especially watching to see if what they see you do matches up with what they hear you say and deciding whether or not they want to be a Christian. So I hope and pray with all my heart that your life gives glory to Jesus Christ so that your children and your spouses will not consider any other option than making Him their Lord and Savior! There is no greater fruit than that, so for their sake, do WHATEVER it takes to insure that your walk matches your talk and glorifies the Lord!

Another encouraging passage of scripture when the devil tempts us with discouragement is Joel 2:25-27, which says:
25 “I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten — the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm — my great army that I sent among you.
26 You will have plenty to eat, until you are full, and you will praise the name of the LORD your God, who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be shamed.
27 Then you will know that I am in Israel, that I am the LORD your God, and that there is no other; never again will my people be shamed.
This is a tough passage for some Christians to digest, because they mistakenly believe that the Lord never causes anything bad to happen in our lives, but that’s wishful thinking and not in accordance with what the Bible tells us. For instance, verse 13 says Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the LORD your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity. God does allow calamity, and He even sends it to get our attention when we are not living our lives for the Lord’s honor, praise and glory, for which we were created, and called to do when we made Jesus our Lord and Savior. Jesus didn’t die just to give us fire insurance, but that’s how many Christians live their lives, and God CAN NOT allow that to continue without dealing with it. So read the whole chapter of Joel 2, and you will see that God uses whatever it takes to make us get our hearts and lives right with Him so that we will praise Him and give Him the glory He demands. Remember, the very first commandment was that we put NO other god’s before Him, which includes our husbands, wives, children, marriages, jobs or anything else., and He is described as a “jealous” god in many verses, such as Exodus 34:14, which says Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God. However, the GREAT news is that when we repent and turn our hearts and lives back to the Lord, He will give us at least double what we lost as we saw by reading the whole chapter of Joel 2, and in Hosea 2.

We could all save ourselves so much pain and disappointment if we’d just learn to be obedient to the Lord’s will in the first place, because when we don’t listen to Him and live in accordance with what His word teaches us, He WILL get our attention by whatever means it takes. The sad news is that many of us are where we are in our marriages today because of our failure to know, understand, and live in accordance with what the Bible teaches us about our roles as husbands and wives. I can’t tell you how many times I hear “I just didn’t know…”, which I myself have said, but that does not change the outcome in our lives and the consequences we now have to deal with. That alone should be enough to convince us how important it is to find out what God expects of us, and then to do it simply for the sake of obedience to Him. And the ONLY way to do that is to seriously study His word, the Bible, which is His Owners’ Manual to us, His creation, and His love letter to us, His Beloved!. And when we do, we will better understand and know how to receive the fruit of discipline and the promise of reward found there!

With every passing day in this ministry, the Lord reveals one of my greatest flaws, which I must confess is impatience. That’s interesting, because I used to think I was pretty patient, with a few exceptions, like waiting for something I wanted. But I used to think I was patient with other people. In fact, I thought I was a LOT more patient than most! What a prideful attitude that was! When we spend quality time with the Lord, He has a way of revealing our faults and shortcomings and humbling us, so that’s something I’ve got to work on!

The reason for sharing that today is to try to express a sincere sense of frustration and helplessness often experienced as I minister to women standing for marriage restoration. While I’ve seen the Lord perform some amazing miracles, the issue we all seem to struggle with the most is the one that’s the most important, and that’s getting control of our thoughts. There’s no point in doing anything toward the restoration of our marriages until we realize that marriage restoration, the salvation of our husbands and children, healing or anything else we want begins with understanding and employing the miraculous power of “kingdom” thinking. It’s really sad to realize that most of us know a lot more about the physical laws of nature than we do about the spiritual laws of God. And just as surely as the physical laws of nature have to be observed for certain results, and when they are not, deadly and disastrous results may occur, so it is with the laws of God. Most of the women I talk to would tell you how I often tell them I wish I could put my knowledge and understanding in their heads and hearts, but I can’t, and if they don’t want what they profess to want enough to do what it takes to understand the spiritual laws of God, which is what I mean by “kingdom thinking”, there is little I can do to help them.

We’ve all heard that old saying “God helps those who help themselves”, and while that’s not really in the Bible as some believe, there is a lot in the Bible that could be translated to mean that. For instance, Deuteronomy 4:29 says But if from there you seek the LORD your God, you will find him if you look for him with all your heart and with all your soul. When we lose something, we turn everything upside-down looking for it. Or when we want to buy something in particular, we’ll go from one place to another trying to find just what we’re looking for, but how much time are we willing to spend to find out what the Lord has to give us in His word through understanding His law and the power of His kingdom? If we don’t seek Him and the instruction and promises He gave us in His word, The Bible, we are NOT going to “find” Him. God has shown me on a much smaller scale how He must feel. He gives us everything we need to know in His word, but we won’t even take the time to find out what He wants to tell us, even though it’s ALL for our benefit. In the same way, so many of the women who call don’t take the time to read the information posted on the website and often ask about topics covered in great detail, which I often devoted considerable time and study to address on their behalf; but for what purpose if they won’t even read it. It’s a very good thing for ALL of us that God’s nature is so much more forgiving, loving and patient than mine! And it’s a good thing that God doesn’t devote only as much time working on our behalf and thinking about us as we spend thinking about Him, or trying to know and understand Him and His laws better!

Now, the REAL point of this post is to encourage, and even admonish, men and women who are standing for marriage restoration to get serious about it and start using the tools available to help understand the awesome power of kingdom thinking. In addition to reading our Bibles and taking advantage of the information provided on websites like the FAM sites, there are many anointed teachers on the radio and TV, and many good topical books available; but we’ve got to make the effort to listen to them and to read them in order to learn from them.

We need to understand that unless we demonstrate to the Lord that He can trust us with something so little, such as devoting time to learning and understanding His laws by reading and studying the Bible, and by listening to and reading books by His anointed teachers and preachers to better understand His word, He’s not going to trust us with anything more. If you doubt that, just read the parable of the talents (equivalent to $1000.00) in Matthew 25:14-30. And please don’t forget that the Lord tells us in Matthew 6:33 (KJV) But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

I received this in an email from one of the FAM members yesterday, but don’t know who the original author is. However, I doubt she will mind if I share her story here, since it was meant to illustrate such an important principle of faith, and something every woman standing for marriage restoration knows ALL about!

Once upon a time there was a bunch of tiny frogs… who arranged a running competition. The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower. A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants…. The race began…. Honestly,no one in the crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower. You heard statements such as: “Oh, WAY too difficult!!”,
“They will NEVER make it to the top.” Or “Not a chance that they will succeed. The tower is too high!” The tiny frogs began collapsing. One by one…. Except for those, who in a fresh tempo, were climbing higher and higher…. The crowd continued to yell, “It is too difficult!!! No one will make it!” More tiny frogs got tired and gave up…. But ONE continued higher and higher and higher…. This one wouldn’t give up! At the end everyone else had given up climbing the tower. Except for the one tiny frog who, after a big effort, was the only one who reached the top! THEN all of the other tiny frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it? A contestant asked the tiny frog how he had found the strength to succeed and reach the goal? It turned out that the winner was DEAF!!!!

The wisdom of this story is:
Never listen to other people’s tendencies to be negative or pessimistic….because they take your most wonderful dreams and wishes away from you — the ones you have in your heart!
Always think of the power words have. Because everything you hear and read will affect your actions!
Therefore, ALWAYS be….POSITIVE!
And above all, Be DEAF when people tell YOU that you cannot fulfill your dreams!
Always think, God and I can do this!

What a cute little story illustrating how easily we can be discouraged by listening to those around us, when instead we need to be listening ONLY to the word of God wich tells us in Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

While I’ve often heard the terms “pressing in” and “pressing on” used to mean don’t, give up, this morning was the first time I searched the Bible to see what it says about it, and what I found was very interesting.

First, it was interesting to note that all of the terms like ”pressing hard”, “pressed all day”, “pressed” and presses” ALWAYS produced something good or a definite result. For instance, olives were pressed to produce oil to light the lamps, grapes were pressed to make wine, figs were pressed and used for sustenance, numerous battles were won by pressing on, and the woman with the issue of blood was healed when she pressed through the crowds to touch the hem of Jesus’ garment.

Some of the most encouraging references about pressing are in Philippians 3, as the whole chapter encourages us to press on to victory in Christ!

The following verses are some of my favorites, and best illustrate why we have to press on to victory, no matter what obstacles we face in the natural realm, if we want our marriages to be restored.

Philippians 3:14
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
That tells us that we have to press on toward the goal to win, and it is in the strength of Christ that we press on, knowing that our stand for marriage restoration is in accordance with His call on our lives.

Leviticus 24:2
“Command the Israelites to bring you clear oil of pressed olives for the light so that the lamps may be kept burning continually.
That says that we have to press on and stand CONTINUALLY, which doesn’t mean some times we do and some times we don’t.

2 Samuel 11:25
David told the messenger, “Say this to Joab: ‘Don’t let this upset you; the sword devours one as well as another. Press the attack against the city and destroy it.’ Say this to encourage Joab.”
This reminds us that either side can win in the spiritual battle now being waged against our marriages, so it’s important not to be upset by the circumstances and to press on to destroy every weapon Satan is using against us and our marriages.

Hosea 6:3
Let us acknowledge the LORD; let us press on to acknowledge him. As surely as the sun rises, he will appear; he will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth.”
How awesome this verse is! ALL we have to do is acknowledge the Lord and His power and might. Even when the circumstances arise to discourage us, we have to keep our eyes on Him and know ABSOLUTELY that He will show up and refresh us and meet our needs!

Luke 6:38
Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
I’ve always thought of this only in terms of tithes, but when I read it this morning, it took on a whole new meaning, as the Lord showed me that this also applies to the measure of faith we use and the measure we use to press on. If you ever need a reason to press on to victory, this should do it!

Yesterday, Joyce Meyer started an awesome series on her TV broadcast about pressing in to a new beginning, which you can watch here Pressing In to a New Beginning. Joyce feels so strongly that this is one of her best series that she’s making it available for any size donation, so I’d encourage you to take the time to check it out. It’s been VERY good so far and she makes some very good points that can help anyone standing for marriage restoration.

What an AWESOME God we serve! I’m almost overwhelmed with awe of my Lord and Savior this morning! I know the things I’ve been seeing Him do in the lives of some of the FAM members are real and true, but it’s all SO incredible that it’s almost unbelievable! Also, I am so humbled and so much in awe of how the Lord is using this ministry, and as so many things are when the Lord is in control, it has far exceeded anything I ever could have imagined. These numbers might not mean much to anyone not familiar with websites and all things related, but to anyone who knows, they are astounding! I first published the site around the middle of February and so far this month alone, with NO advertising, we have had over 500 unique visitors to the site, including 335 visitors who accessed the site through the search engines by using 204 different search phrases! We’re ranking very high in the search engines in a very competitive category on the major search engines, and almost all of our traffic comes from Google and MSN. We have visitors from EVERY part of the earth (a total of 31 different countries), even regions I had never heard of before! And there are now nine members of the FAM fellowship and we already have three local FAM Home Groups! And God’s only just begun!

The most rewarding part of it all is seeing how the Lord is working in the lives of our members and knowing how the praise testimonies are glorifying the Lord and how they will be used to defeat Satan and every wicked weapon he intends to destroy our marriages. I am ttruly blessed to actually see and be part of the awesome things the Holy Spirit has been doing in the supernatural realm, and we know it’s Him, because there is NO possible natural explanation! It’s also awe inspiring how many new and exciting ideas the Holy Spirit keeps giving me for the ministry. Trust me, being creative and inventive is FAR from being one of my strong suits, so I know that is the Lord at work in me!

The passage of scripture I want to share this morning is what the Lord placed on my heart as I read an awesome testimony about God’s amazing grace and love from one of the FAM members yesterday. May it encourage you as much as it does me.

Romans 8:
28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.
30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
31 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?
32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?
33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies.
34 Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.
35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?
36 As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,
39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

As I often write, determining God’s will is the first step for anyone deciding to stand for the restoration of their marriage, but sometimes that seems to be the most difficult step of all, which I have a hard time understanding. Perhaps it’s not really a matter of understanding on my part, but more a matter of not having patience when it comes to that because I have learned the hard way that we can all know and determine the will of God. God is not the author of confusion, so that means confusion comes from Satan, and that REALLY frustrates me. Sometimes the truth hurts, and the truth is that in most cases, the reason we question God’s will is because it is not the same as ours, and we’re not willing or ready to submit to HIS will, which God calls rebellion. And rebellion is VERY dangerous in the life of a Christian, but I’ll leave that topic for a future post.

The following verses from Psalm 32 speak volumes about knowing God’s will:
8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.
9 Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you.
10 Many are the woes of the wicked, but the LORD’s unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him.
Obviously, God’s will is NEVER intended to be a mystery, and when we read and study His word, the Bible, He instructs and teaches us His will for EVERY situation in our lives. Not only does He reveal His will, but He counsels, guides and leads us, and watches over and protects us as we do what He instructs and teaches us through His word. When we fail to understand and do what He wants us to, He WILL do WHATEVER it takes to bring us back into his plan and purpose for our lives, so we could save ourselves and others a lot of pain and misery if we’d realize that in the first place and joyfully submit to what His word teaches us. No matter how difficult it may seem or how little sense it makes from our own perspective, we are ALWAYS better off to be obedient and submissive to God’s leadership in our lives, because NOTHING could ever be better than being surrounded by God’s UNFAILING love!

Charles Stanley started a four part series on the will of God last Sunday and I strongly encourage anyone serious about standing for marriage restoration to watch the entire series, because he provides excellent guidelines and instructions for determining and walking in God’s will. The first two messages in the series are available now at this link Charles Stanley – The Will Of God, and the other two will be available the next two weeks, so do yourself a HUGE favor and take the time to watch them. I like his messages so much that I often watch them several times, because he packs SO much into such a short time, so here’s a link to Charles Stanley’s Archives.

Based on conversations with FAM Fellowship members, the email I receive and the search phrases used to bring people to this ministry, I know one of the most challenging issues for many standing for the restoration of their marriage is standing itself. Sadly, one of the search phrases used this week probably expresses how a lot of people feel, but don’t verbalize, at least not to me, because they know what my answer would be. The search phrase was “how long should you stand for restoration of your marriage”, which I’ll attempt to address today by sharing just a few Bible verses about standing..

First and foremost though, the answer to that question is that if you have to ask it, you probably need to seriously examine your reasons and motives for standing for marriage restoration in the first place, and more than likely they’re not what they should be. So please take a minute to HONESTLY answer this question. Why are you standing for the restoration of your marriage? Since that’s something I often ask the women I talk to, I know what the usual answers are. And based on what James 4:3 tells us about why our prayers are not answered, they’re cause for concern, because it says When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

The ONLY answer to the “why” question that keeps us from asking the “how long” question is “in obedience and submission to the will and word of God.” And that’s why I tell every woman I speak to about marriage restoration that she MUST first determine the will of God for her situation through studying the Bible and prayer and fasting. That’s the ONLY way we can ever stand firm for the restoration of our marriages…NO MATTER WHAT. And as Isaiah 7:9 tells us …>If you do not stand firm in your faith, you will not stand at all.'” When we stand for the restoration of our marriages in obedience and submission to Christ, that makes Him the priority of our lives, and NOT our husbands and not our marriages. In fact, I firmly believe that many of us made the mistake of putting our husbands and marriages above our walk and relationship with the Lord, and the Bible is full of scripture verses clearly warning us that He will take anything we place above Him away from us. The very first commandment was that we should have no other gods before Him, and many of us are guilty of doing exactly that in terms of our husbands and marriages. Don’t expect the Lord to restore a relationship that you want or think you need more than Him, because it won’t happen! However, you CAN rely on the promise found in Matthew 6:33, which says But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. So our PRIMARY focus should be seeking the Lord and His righteousness, and then HE will give us the restoration of our marriages.

Our obedience and submission to the will and word of Christ is the ONLY foundation strong enough to withstand the storms and trials of marriage restoration, and the ONLY one that will be strong enough to hold our marriages together once the Lord restores them. Jesus gives us a very powerful illustration of that in these verses from Matthew 7:
24 “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.
25 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.
26 But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand.
27 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”

I hope the following verses will encourage you and remind you to stand firm in your faith and confidence in the will and word of God, and in the knowledge that HE is the one who WILL restore your marriage.

Proverbs 10:25
When the storm has swept by, the wicked are gone, but the righteous stand firm forever.

Exodus 14:13
Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again.

1 Samuel 12:16
“Now then, stand still and see this great thing the LORD is about to do before your eyes!

James 5:8
You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near.

2 Corinthians 1:
20 For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.
21 Now it is God who makes both us and you stand firm in Christ. He anointed us,
22 set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.

Psalm 33:11
But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations.

While it’s not easy to attain, walking in TRUE humility is one of the most powerful and effective tools we have for marriage restoration, especially when our spouse is involved with someone else and we’re the only one standing for the restoration of our marriage. God demonstrated that in a most spectacular and awesome way in the life of one of the FAM Fellowship members last night, as she’ll be sharing in a Praise Testimony on the members’ section of the site later today, which prompted me to make humility the topic of my post this morning and next week’s Restoration Principles.

This is another topic I’m sure I could write an entire book on, because it IS SO important, and yet SO challenging to achieve. I honestly believe that getting to a point of REAL and GENUINE humility is the beginning of the “breakthrough” we seek in the restoration of our marriages. What finally helped me get to that point was reading a book that put all of the Bible verses about pride and humility together in one chapter. There probably weren’t any verses I hadn’t heard before, but somehow the impact was much more effective when I saw them all together and realized how many there are. So, the following are some of the verses in the Bible that teach us how deadly and destructive pride is and how powerful humility is.

Job 40:12
look at every proud man and humble him, crush the wicked where they stand.

Isaiah 2:
17 The arrogance of man will be brought low and the pride of men humbled; the LORD alone will be exalted in that day,
18 and the idols will totally disappear.

Proverbs 3:34
He mocks proud mockers but gives grace to the humble.

Proverbs 11:2
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

Proverbs 15:33
The fear of the LORD teaches a man wisdom, and humility comes before honor.

Proverbs 18:12
Before his downfall a man’s heart is proud, but humility comes before honor.

Proverbs 22:4
Humility and the fear of the LORD bring wealth and honor and life.

James 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

1 Peter 5:5
Young men, in the same way be submissive to those who are older. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

James 3:
13 Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.
14 But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth.
15 Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil.
16 For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.
17 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.
18 Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.

Colossians 3:12
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Philippians 2
1 If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion,
2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.
3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

Psalm 45:
3 Gird your sword upon your side, O mighty one; clothe yourself with splendor and majesty.
4 In your majesty ride forth victoriously in behalf of truth, humility and righteousness; let your right hand display awesome deeds.
5 Let your sharp arrows pierce the hearts of the king’s enemies; let the nations fall beneath your feet.

What an AWESOME and GLORIOUS promise the Lord gives us in these last verses!. When we live and walk in the truth, humility and righteousness of Jesus Christ He WILL ride forth in HIS majesty to victoriously accomplish His will and purpose for our lives, and with the power and might of His righteous right hand, display AWESOME deeds on our behalf! The power of His word will be released to bring EVERYTHING Satan intended for the destruction of our husbands and marriages under the authority and submission of Jesus Christ, and our marriages will be restored for the praise, glory and honor of our Lord and Savior!

For more on this topic, you can read an earlier post, Deadly Dangers Of Pride And Anger.

There is a very direct connection for those who experience marriage restoration and the amount of time spent reading the Bible, because it’s not possible to have the faith and steadfastness needed for the restoration of our marriages without getting very serious about reading and understanding the word of God. Unfortunately, all I can do is make the recommendation, because it’s up to each of us as individuals to determine how committed we are to the restoration of our marriages and whether or not we’re willing to do something so simple, and yet so life transforming!

Since reading the Bible is so important for all Christians; especially those in need of a supernatural move of God’s hand in our lives, such as marriage restoration, a planned schedule for reading the Bible is strongly recommended. Since God gives us so much to encourage and guide us in the Proverbs and Psalms, reading them monthly is a huge blessing, which we can do by reading one chapter of Proverbs and five chapters of the Psalms a day. And an easy way to do that is to read the Proverb that coincides with the day of the month; like Proverbs 23 for today. Then read the Psalm that coincides with the date; Psalm 23 today, and then read four more chapters from the Psalms in increments of 30; like Psalm 53, 83, 113 and 143 today. Since Psalm 119 is so long, it can be skipped and read along with Proverbs 31 in the months with 31 days. And using online Bibles, like BibleGateway.com, makes it easier to read a different version each month for even more insight and interest. In addition to that, it’s important to have a planned reading schedule of a set number of chapters each day to eventually get through the ENTIRE Bible.

Many Christians think reading the Old Testament is boring or difficult, but the modern versions make it a lot easier to read and understand, and it really helps build up our faith and trust in the Lord. It also teaches us so much about the character and nature of God, so it’s VERY important to set aside time to seriously read and STUDY the Bible.

If we read what David wrote in Psalm 143, we can probably all relate to the despair he experienced. But don’t rush through this chapter; take the time to read it line by line and consider what each verse means, especially the wisdom of David’s instruction for all of us in times of despair as found in the following verses:
5 I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done.
When we reflect on the glory of God, all of the awesome stories of deliverance and blessings found in the Old Testament (even our own testimonies or those of others) and the absolute wonder of all of God’s creation, it is totally awe inspiring and uplifting! That’s why it is critically important to keep our focus on God’s omnipotence and NOT our problems.
6 I spread out my hands to you; my soul thirsts for you like a parched land. Selah
God wants us to acknowledge our absolute helplessness and to surrender our lives to Him, desperately longing for what ONLY He can give.
7 Answer me quickly, O LORD; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit.
There are many Bible verses confirming that God creates and uses disasters in our lives to make us totally dependent on Him or to bring us back into His will for our lives, so He is moved when we so desperately acknowledge our need of Him.
8 Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.
We can always count on God to respond and acknowledge it when we are in despair, and we put our trust in His UNFAILING love And give our deepest concerns to Him, and rely totally on His leadership.
9 Rescue me from my enemies, O LORD, for I hide myself in you.
When we trust God and do things HIS way, He will ALWAYS rescue us!
10 Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit
lead me on level ground.
When we ask and surrender to Him, the Lord is faithful to teach us to do His will, for which He gives us the Holy Spirit to help make us more consistent in our walk and faith. As we saw in yesterday’s post, we have to ask Him to give us a more steadfast heart when we despair and falter.
11 For your name’s sake, O LORD, preserve my life; in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble.
We are always saved and delivered for the praise and glory of God, as we’ve seen in previous posts, and it is when we live in His righteousness, according to what His word teaches, that God hears and answers our prayers. That’s why we MUST know what His word, the Bible, tells us. We have to know what His righteousness means and we have to know what brings praise and glory to His name, as well as what does not. God is never going to answer a prayer that does not bring praise, glory and honor to Jesus Christ and when we’re living in accordance with His will and word, and love Him above everything else, He absolutely WILL fulfill EVERY promise found in His word!
12 In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes, for I am your servant.
When we give our lives to the Lord by truly making Him the Lord of our lives, and live in accordance with His will and word, the gates of Hell can NOT prevail against us, because we are His church; we are His bride and He died for us! He died to give us victory over Satan and every weapon fashioned against us, and to give us hope and confidence in every word and promise we find in His love letter to us; the Bible! Is it even remotely possible that our spouses could send us a love letter that we wouldn’t read every word of, NO matter how long it was? Of course not! And it’s totally ridiculous to even suggest that! So I hope and pray you will remember that the next time you say you love the Lord and the next time you open your Bible.

One of the greatest obstacles to marriage restoration is our own doubt and unbelief, so we must focus on strengthening our faith, because as Hebrews 11:6 tells us And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. In fact, when we don’t live by faith, God is not pleased with us, as we see in Hebrews 10:38, which says ”But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him.” And these verses in James 1 take that even further, because they very clearly state that a lack of faith can keep the Lord from answering our prayers:
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,
3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.
4 Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.
6 But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.
7 That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord;
8 he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.

Many years ago I heard a phrase I use when I need to make sure my thoughts line up with the promises and confidence I have in the word of God, which is “Who’s report are you going to believe?” So NO MATTER WHAT WE HEAR OR WHAT WE SEE that tends to make us doubtful, we have to remember God’s promise in Proverbs 21:30, which says There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the LORD.

In the end, it comes down to whether or not we believe in the absolutely omnipotent might and power of our Lord and Savior, and the promises we have in His word, the Bible. We demonstrate that when we live by the words of faith we speak. Unless we believe God is a liar, we shouldn’t be swayed by every little (or big) thing that comes along in the natural realm trying to convince us that the restoration of our marriage is hopeless or impossible. That’s why it’s SO important to follow these instructions found in 2 Corinthians 10:5, which says We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

So “persevere” (hang in there!) in the grace and strength of the Lord, and when you do falter, which you probably will, just make that an opportunity to demonstrate your faith in the Lord by asking Him to create in you a steadfast heart so you can realize the awesome promises we have in these verses in Psalm 112:
6 Surely he will never be shaken; a righteous man will be remembered forever.
7 He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD.
8 His heart is secure, he will have no fear; in the end he will look in triumph on his foes.

I woke up this morning filled with inexplicable joy and full of praise for the Lord’s glory! What an awesome way to start the day! It reminded me of our need to spend more time praising and reflecting on the power and glory of Jesus, so I did a search for praise and glory in the Bible, and here’s what the Lord showed me.

We can All probably remember making promises and vows to the Lord when we needed His help and provision in a desperate situation, but did we remember those promises and vows once the Lord delivered us? Or did we forget, and fail to share it with others and give Him appropriate praise and honor? He deserves and EXPECTS nothing less than our total adoration and praise for his power and glory, so don’t forget to praise Him as we see in Psalm 66 and Psalm 72.

Our failure to give the Lord appropriate praise and honor could actually prevent or delay the restoration of our marriages, as seen in these verses from 1 Peter 1:
6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials.
7 These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.
8 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy,
9 for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
As with so many other Bible verses we’ve often referred to, these verses demonstrate how important genuine faith is to the Lord and how necessary it is for the realization of everything we’re standing for. When the Lord brings us through the trials we deal with as we stand for the restoration of our marriages, He doesn’t want us to forget and He expects us to share it with others, which is the reason for using a website like this in our ministry. Remembering and sharing all that the Lord does for us helps strengthen our faith, and encourages others, and accesses the authority of Christ and overcomes the power of Satan as we see in these verses from Revelation 12:
9 The great dragon was hurled down—that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.
10 Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: “Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Christ. For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down.
11 They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.
12 Therefore rejoice, you heavens and you who dwell in them! But woe to the earth and the sea, because the devil has gone down to you! He is filled with fury, because he knows that his time is short.”.

From the very beginning, God planned EVERYTHING for the ultimate praise and glory of Jesus Christ, as we see again in these verses from Ephesians 1:
9 And he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ,
10 to be put into effect when the times will have reached their fulfillment—to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ.
11 In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will,
12 in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory.
That is the purpose for our existence and the purpose for everything we go through, so it’s VERY important for us to understand that and release the supernatural power found only in praising and giving glory to Jesus, our Lord and Savior!

As we can expect with every promise from God, these verses from Revelation 5 show us how His awesome plan to reveal the glory of Jesus Christ will be fulfilled:
11 Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand. They encircled the throne and the living creatures and the elders.
12 In a loud voice they sang: “Worthy is the Lamb, who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and strength and honor and glory and praise!”
13 Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them, singing: “To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be praise and honor and glory and power, for ever and ever!”

It is not uncommon for a husband who has left his marriage to be referred to as “The Prodigal” by those standing for the restoration of their marriages. And even though I personally don’t feel comfortable with such labels, it’s true that we can learn a lot about standing for marriage restoration by taking a much closer look at the parable of the prodigal son in Luke 15.

Based on my conversations with some of the FAM Fellowship members last week, I had already decided to use this parable as the basis for this week’s Restoration Principles, and I have been contemplating it and what it teaches us about standing for marriage restoration when our husbands leave us. As God always does, He was faithful to confirm this topic and to give me some additional insight through the messages from some of the preachers I listen to the most. David Jeremiah’s TV message yesterday was about the prodigal son as it relates to grace, and he pointed out that the parable tells us a lot more about the father than it does about the prodigal son, which is exactly what I’ve been more focused on! Then Joyce Meyer mentioned the parable of the prodigal son in her message this morning from another perspective, so I’m really looking forward to writing this week’s Restoration Principles. It will be from the perspective of how we should react and respond when our husbands do the same thing to us that the prodigal son did to his father, and how that relates to these verses in 1 Corinthians 7:
15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?.
Unlike many Christians, and even Christian leaders today, I don’t believe these verses mean we are free to remarry when an unsaved spouse leaves us, because that totally contradicts so many other verses of scripture. But, we’ll get into all of that in a lot more detail in this week’s Restoration Principles.

Since peace seems so elusive for many women standing for marriage restoration and it’s an area of significant challenge for so many of the women coming to our ministry, I’m providing a link to purchase this book by Joyce Meyer. Don’t let Satan steal your peace and joy, because he can’t have it unless you give it to him! I believe this inexpensive book will help you understand and overcome that.

Peace
By Joyce Meyer

Are you trying to do the impossible? Are you working too hard to change the people around you? Are you unhappy because you’re not where you want to be spiritually? Are you losing your peace? If you don’t have peace, you can’t enjoy life. Now Joyce Meyer shows you how to gain mastery over your day-to-day existence…while you find peace in the midst of the storm. She’ll teach you how to: wait on God and His perfect timing; outsmart the “peace stealers” who set you up to get you upset; find power in a calm and trusting attitude; focus on the grace of today and not the worries of tomorrow. The peace of God passes all understanding. It’s His free gift to you. Are you ready to receive it?

It’s very exciting to observe how many people are coming to our ministry by searching for marriage related prayers, because there’s no way to adequately express the importance of prayer in marriage restoration. In response, we will focus more on meeting that need in the future by adding more prayers on the site in the days and weeks to come. In the meanwhile, I’d like to recommend this classic book of prayers for every married woman, whether dealing with issues of separation and divorce or not, because every wife should be praying for her husband, and you get $2.00 off the retail price by ordering from ChristianBook.com.

The
Power of a Praying Wife
By Stormie Omartian

What is strong enough to transform a troubled marriage into a loving relationship? The prayers of a godly wife! Sharing examples from her marriage, Omartian encourages every wife to pray for all areas of her husband’s life. Her poignant insights, along with empowering Scripture verses and prayers, will assure you of God’s promises of restoration and renewal. 203 pages, softcover from Harvest.

No matter how strong we are, we all have moments of weakness and need to be reminded once in awhile how much the Lord cares about EVERYTHING concerning our lives. It is possible to intellectually know that He controls everything, and still lose sight of how much He loves us and how intimately involved He is in EVERY detail of our lives. And perhaps someone needs to be reminded of that today.

These verses from Matthew 10 leave little doubt of how concerned and involved God is in our lives:
29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father.
30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.
31 So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.

When you need to be reminded of God’s love, provision and protection, you can find reassurance by reading Psalm 121 and Psalm 23.

And if your husband or wife is not in your home or life today, that’s just not God’s plan for you right now, so figure out what He wants you to do TODAY, and DO it. Yesterday is gone, and mourning over what we had yesterday, does not glorify the Lord, and it certainly does not demonstrate faith that He is going to bring us a better tomorrow! So don’t let what happened yesterday ruin your today. Focus on what the Lord calls you to do today and leave the details of your tomorrow in God’s care.

During the night last night, the Lord woke me up and told me to write about peace that passes understanding and the renewal of our minds today, so I couldn’t wait to check the verses out this morning to see what He wanted me to write in today’s post. As I’ve often said before, it never ceases to amaze me how I can look at Bible verses I’m so familiar with, and then find something in them that I just never saw before! Of course, that’s exactly why the Bible is “The Living Word”!

Sometimes it’s not so much about being familiar with the verses, as it is making the connection between related verses, and perhaps that is more what today’s message is about. Romans 12:2 tells us:
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Most people would say that is accomplished through reading and studying the Bible so we know and understand God’s plan and will for our lives. And while that’s definitely true, I think there’s a lot more to it, especially since I know so many people who read the Bible, and still don’t seem to have their minds renewed or experience the peace of God that passes all understanding.

God showed me this morning that the answer to renewing our minds and experiencing His peace that passes all understanding is found inn these verses from Philippians 4:
6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. How much simpler or clearer could it be? If we follow the instructions in these verses, our minds WILL be TOTALLY renewed and there’s no way we could have anything but peace! The challenge is retraining our minds to think that way, because anyone standing for marriage restoration knows how much time we spend doing the exact opposite of what these verses tell us, especially when it comes to the things we spend most of our time thinking and talking about! Many years ago I heard an expression that says the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results, which makes a lot of sense; but that’s something most of us have to admit doing. So if we want different results, we need to start doing something different, and putting the advice and instructions found in these verses into practice is an excellent place to start!

When the Bible was originally written, it did not include the chapter and verse distinctions our modern versions do, so I like to look at what the previous chapter has to say, and sometimes I find something of particular interest by doing that, as I did this morning. So, here’s Romans 11:36 and Romans 12:1-2 (AMP) together, without the chapter and verse distinction:
For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. [For all things originate with Him and come from Him; all things live through Him, and all things center in and tend to consummate and to end in Him.] To Him be glory forever! Amen (so be it). I APPEAL to you therefore, brethren, and beg of you in view of [all] the mercies of God, to make a decisive dedication of your bodies [presenting all your members and faculties] as a living sacrifice, holy (devoted, consecrated) and well pleasing to God, which is your reasonable (rational, intelligent) service and spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you].

Since peace seems so elusive for many men and women standing for marriage restoration and is an area of significant challenge for many people when they first come to the ministry, it’s important to know that we don’t have to let Satan steal our peace and joy; because he can’t have it unless we give it to him! But when we put the instruction of the above verses into practice, our minds will be renewed and we will have peace that Satan can’t steal!