God is Working in Your Spouse’s Heart this Valentine’s Day! by Stephanie

First of all, Happy Valentine’s Day to you all! And please let this time be a reminder that God loves you so much!!!

I want to share more of my experience as a prodigal with the hope that you will be comforted and encouraged to know that God really does use Valentine’s Day and other holidays to speak to your prodigal’s heart, mind and spirit. I can remember clearly during my own prodigal days how God talked to me. Regrettably, that was a time when I believed I was deeply in love with my NCP and really believed that I didn’t love my husband. In fact, he intensely irritated me and I really disliked him. I blamed him for everything that was wrong in our marriage, and even felt that it was his fault that I had a NCP. Now that’s deception! But I was so blinded that I just couldn’t see anything positive about him at that time.

As I think back to one of my “prodigal moments,” I remember shopping for the NCP for Valentine’s Day and what happened when I went to the store looking for a special card and gift for him. I was excited until I got into the store, and all of a sudden I was overwhelmed with sadness. But I shrugged it off and kept going. I began reading the cards and couldn’t help remembering how my husband used to get me the most beautiful cards. But I shrugged that off again and my counter attack was that my NCP loved me way more, and treated me far better. So I kept reading the cards and finally picked one, and then I began searching for a gift. I walked by some men’s shirts and started to pick the kind my husband would like. And I even thought about a time he took me to dinner, and wondered, “Why am I thinking about him of all people!”

Then when it came time to see the NCP, all I felt was guilt. And it didn’t matter what a great time I thought I was having, because deep down I knew it was wrong. I KNEW God was unhappy with me, and the guilt ruined my time with the NCP and that made me angry. But I pretended with the NCP; pretending to be enjoying myself and having a good time. And I even convinced myself that I was. Then on the drive home, I felt sick to my stomach, and I started to wonder if the NCP would be there if I was sick. I was unsure, but I knew my husband would be. There are several more examples I could give, but my point is this…YOUR PRODIGAL CANNOT GET YOU OFF OF HIS/HER MIND NO MATTER HOW MUCH THEY FIGHT IT!

I can assure you that God actually comes on stronger than ever to prodigals on days like this!! He begins to discipline us and to speak to our hearts and we have no idea what is going on. Remember…we haven’t been able to hear Him for a long time, so we are confused. But God places the love we have for you, which we have deliberately hidden from ourselves on our hearts (Proverbs 21:1). After all, we are one flesh with you, and bound by the covenant God has made with us (Matthew 19:1-9). And He is using that; He was there when we said “I do” and He means what He says about marriage. He created it and He wants us to take our covenant with you and HIM very seriously (Malachi 2). And it doesn’t matter if you’ve seen us or talked to us or not. And it doesn’t matter who we’re with or what we’re doing (Proverbs 21:30). God won’t stop convicting us, especially on a day about love (Proverbs 16:1).

So even though challenging and emotionally difficult, don’t get caught up in sadness, despair and pity parties. Remember God’s instructions to us in Philippians 4:4-7 and 1 Thessalonians 5:18 and remember that the Lord has you in His righteous right hand. He will comfort you, and at the same time, He will give your prodigal no peace and no rest in their sin and disobedience (Isaiah 57:20-21). They are being called on the carpet today, and God will NOT let them rest. YOU ARE ON THEIR MINDS…YOU ARE IN THEIR HEARTS…YOU ARE WHO THEY LOVE and GOD IS SHOWING IT TO THEM!!! Watch out! God is working overtime for you on this day and many others!!!

I am praying for myself and all of you. May we stand strong on the power of God’s Word and promises and believe that our Father is taking care of everything!

With Love,

2 Responses

  1. response by Angela in California     

    Stephanie, you are a true blessing and gift from God to share the way you do. The way you help us see things from a prodigal’s perspective is special. And this message was especially on time for me. Thank you so much for showing me a differnt perspective that I probably wouldn’t have recognized on my own. God bless you and the entire FAMM family. These posts have helped me over the past few months more than you will ever know.

  2. response by Cynthia     

    Stephanie, you are absolutely correct in that. I was a prodigal wife and always tried to shake my husband out of my head and was always trying to believe the lies Satan put into my head as well.
    now that I’m ready, my husband isn’t and is getting married. So I pray that the thoughts I always had about him, he will have for me as well and will return to me, his prodigal wife.

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