There’s NO peace for Prodigals by Stephanie

(Note from Linda: We are all so blessed to have the powerful testimonies of those who have been led astray by Satan and then delivered by the mercy, grace, love and power of our dear Lord and Savior–it’s the most encouraging evidence that God does bring wayward spouses back home! And we are once again blessed that Stephanie has been led to share her experience as a prodigal and the insight gained through her experience and being restored to the Lord, which she posted on the private FAM Fellowship website last night. So I hope and pray that this strong testimony of God’s faithfulness to work in the heart, mind and spirit of our spouses when they are caught up in adultery will bless and encourage everyone who needs it today. As Proverbs 21:30 declares, There is no wisdom, no insight and no plan that can succeed against the Lord! So please take the time to read and meditate on the following scripture references because we have to put our hope in the power and promise of God’s Word as we stand in faith and obedience for the deliverance of our adulterous spouses and the restoration of our marriages and families. And when we do, we will without a doubt be blessed and encouraged beyond belief!)

*****

Thank you all so much for your responses to my earlier post. I was truly blessed and humbled, as I always struggle to share as a prodigal; yet I’ve been strongly led to write something again. My husband and I just spent two wonderful nights together because his sister was staying at his parents’ house; yet he went back there tonight. We really had such a great time, and I have to admit that I began to cry and have a pity party when he left, but I thanked God anyway. Suddenly, my tears stopped and I felt the need to share again. So I prayed that God would lead me as I write, and here it is.

When I was in what I call my “prodigal moments,” there was a period of time when I was in the thick of sin and God was tapping me on the shoulder, but I ignored him. And there were times that the guilt of my actions overwhelmed and consumed me so much that I could not enjoy the time with the NCP. I was restless, discontented, unhappy, and unable to sleep. Why? God does not give adulterers any peace. I guarantee you right now that your prodigal spouse is not peaceful because there is no true peace in sin (Isaiah 48:22). The devil comes along and whispers in the prodigal’s ear and says “look, this other person is right for you…look how they make you feel…it will be okay once you are divorced…everything will be okay…besides, your spouse should have someone who really loves them and you don’t, so set them free.” We believe we must let you, our spouse, go, because it is the right thing to do; we are in it too deep, there is no other way, you are aware of our sin, there is no saving face, and there is no going back. We get trapped in a vicious cycle of self contempt and fleshly pleasure. And we tell you the reason we are leaving is NOT the NCP. But I’m here to tell you…of course it is! We tell you we would have left anyway…then why didn’t we? That is exactly why Satan put this person in our path. He knew that would be just the ticket to get us to act…to commit adultery, to separate and to divorce. Satan not only convinces the prodigal, but uses the NCP as well. So he has two deceived people under his control and manipulation. And the prodigal does what FEELS right; not what IS right.

Again, let me reiterate—there is NO PEACE for the prodigal. Prodigals live in an illusionary world that they believe in. We believe that we are really happy, but that’s not so, and our hearts even tell us that. But we just dismiss it. We chalk it up to not being happy in our marriage…it couldn’t possibly be our adulterous relationship. And we believe we have a future with the other person. But once again, that’s not so because our God would not allow it. He would not prosper a relationship that goes against his Word; not now and not ever! We believe we could never be a good spouse to you because we’ve hurt you so deeply and we “love” the NCP. Again, that’s not so; we love the feeling we get with the NCP and we hate the guilt we feel with you, our spouse. Deep down, we love you, but all we can see now is the negative you, and not the you we fell in love with. And we point out your faults so we can justify our sin to ourselves. So be careful not to display that negativity to us, because it will send us packing. Disarm us with your good, loving side. The more you show us the Christ like love and peace within you, the more restless, uneasy, uncomfortable and far from peaceful we become. Why? (Because you are successfully fighting the enemy with the tools God has given you in his Word (Ephesians 6:12-18) and we can’t stand against that, so we lash back out at you. Remember that Satan is talking to us even louder when you are winning. So stand firm and keep loving us and victory will be yours (Deuteronomy 20:4). It is when you give up, and give in that you waste time and restoration takes longer.

Perhaps I’m rambling; but this is my point—there is no peace for the prodigal!!! And it’s really important to understand that “feelings” do not matter!!! Feelings come and go. Today, your prodigal spouse is distant; tomorrow pleasant; the next day angry; and the next happy–as if life couldn’t be better. God does not want us to operate on feelings. God is not interested in how you feel, but who you are; your character, your relationship with him, and your salvation. And He is not interested in what makes you comfortable. He is asking you…“Do you believe in my Word?” Do you believe in my promises? Do you believe me when I say I hate divorce? (Malachi 2:16) Do you believe that I joined you and your spouse together and what I have joined, let man not separate? (Matthew 19:6) Do you believe that I can do the impossible? (Mark 10:27) Do you believe in me? Do you have faith in my Sovereignty, my power, and my truth? (Deuteronomy 3:24) Do you believe I can bring you through this?”

So when you are hurting, remember…”It’s not about my feelings, but the promise ahead – Psalm 147:3.” When you are angry, remember…”It’s not about my feelings, but the promise ahead – Psalm 135:14.” When you are tearful, remember…It’s not about my feelings, but the promise ahead – Psalm 126:5.” When you are fearful, remember…”it’s not about my feelings, but the promise ahead – Isaiah 41:10.” And when you are disappointed or discouraged, remember…”It’s not about my feelings, but the promise ahead – Psalm 34:18.”

Please, please repeat this to yourself over and over until it sinks in, which I too had to do tonight in my own moment of despair. Stop believing the lies out of your spouse’s mouth. Believe the words out of God’s mouth. Prodigals don’t know which way is up. But you on the other hand, have God and the Holy Spirit, and all of his angels on your left, and on your right, in front of you, behind you, and everywhere you go. You have the power that comes through your prayers, through your fellowship and obedience to God, and through reading his Word daily. YOU HAVE POWER!! GODS FAVOR RESTS WITH YOU! YOU ARE GOD’S CHILD!! YOU ARE JOINT HEIRS WITH JESUS CHRIST! YOU ARE THE OVERCOMER! YOU HAVE THE POWER TO TREAD ON SERPENTS AND DEMOLISH STRONGHOLDS!!! AND THE PRODIGAL IN SIN IS POWERLESS OVER YOU AND YOUR GOD!!!

Start acting and believing like it is so. God commands you to act on your faith. So wipe your tears just like I had to tonight, and get up and act like a child of the most high God!!!! DO something constructive and pray and claim Jeremiah 24:7 for your spouse, because God will be faithful to do this for your prodigal spouse the same way He did it for me! It says I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the LORD. They will be my people, and I will be their God, for they will return to me with all their heart.

With Much Love!!!
Stephanie

36 Responses

  1. response by nichole     

    Thank you so much for your testimony, your encouragement, and that you feel led by God to share these past two posts.

    I have had no contact with my husband, but I know God is working and I know he is feeling and doing just as you say, and that saddens me. But I have all hope in the Lord–faith is the victory that overcomes the world! And I am so looking forward to what is to come and that my husband will be back in a right relationship with the Lord. And in God’s time he will be back or I will hear from him.

    I praise God that although I may read His word over and over, He uses someone else to show me a different way to look at things, or He has someone encourage me. So I praise Him for you and this ministry.

  2. response by Angela     

    Thank you so much for this word!!!!!! It really helps me understand where my husband is at and to not give up.

  3. response by Irean     

    Thank you so much for this testimony. It gives me a clear picture of the spiritual battle that my spouse passes through while he is with the NCP, and reminds me that God does work on both me and my spouse. While God is transforming me to be more like him he is at the sametime working on my spouse. And nothing is impossible for God. I should definitely believe that and I should not doubt. Your testimony has increased my faith in God by knowing what my spouse is passing through in the spiritual realm. And from the spiritual realm, it will physically manifest and at God’s appointed time my marriage will be restored. Thank you! Thank you! God bless you.

  4. response by Irean     

    Thank you, your testimonies always encourage us. Your testimony has given me joy and happiness and a longing to know God more and to be like him. God bless you

  5. response by Christina     

    Thank you so much for sharing this!!!! It was a truly encouraging post at a time when I most needed it. It reminded me of when I was in my prodigal time and God delivered me, and it was just like you described. God touched my heart and turned me back to Him. I have a renewed hunger and thirst for God and I now love and desire my spouse and my marriage again after really believing I never would. Now I am the one standing for my marriage and praying that my husband will end things with the NCP and come back home. Thank you for reminding me of my deliverance and the promises of God. If He can deliver me, I know He can deliver my spouse!

  6. response by Rainman     

    Thank you so much for sharing this, Stephanie. It was as if my wife had written it, because she has said/done nearly all of what you have mentioned. God has lighted my path, and I have such conviction that He has called me to stand and carry out His will, for His glory alone. Peace.

  7. response by Fabiana     

    Thank you so Much! You have no idea how much you helped me! It is just as you said; good moments, bad moments and you never know what will be the next time. I am standing firm with God and I know that as He promised, He will NEVER forsake me!
    So I put everything in God’s hands and I have His peace in my heart. My faith has grown so much that others can see how different I am.
    Again, thank you so much for your words of encouragement. I know that my test will one day be my testemony as well. God Bless you.

  8. response by Augustus     

    I praise God that He led me to this post. My heart was starting to harden toward my wife and i was becoming numb about restoration, but my spirit has been jump started. It’s Thanksgiving and I’m not with my family and haven’t seen my kids, which makes it hard enough, but I will continue to pray and stand on God’s word concerning the restoration of my marriage. Thank you for the perspective this provides, as my wife has said all of the same things to me and I was starting to believe that they were true. Thank you and God bless you.

  9. response by Kim     

    Thank you for your testimony and for blessing me with this information. Praise the Lord that you came to your senses and trusted God to restore you marriage. I have been married for thirty-one years and separated for six months, and I have FAITH that my Lord will restore my marriage. Thank you again and God Bless You!

  10. response by Courtney     

    Praise The Lord! AMEN! This is EXACTLY what I needed because it just confirmed everything I needed to know to keep standing and believing. You are so bold to share this..Thank You, Jesus!

  11. response by Vonnie     

    Thank you for your words of wisdom and encouragement. This really gave me more insight. I so love my Husband and with each day, desire more and more to be restored with him. I love Jesus and I love my family.

  12. response by Kimberly     

    May you be blessed amply by our Lord for sharing your testimony as a prodigal. I have been reading the Word of our Lord and sometimes feel like a little fish in too big of an ocean. Some of what you shared is exactly what my husband has said; yet he returned to the NCP after a short attempt at reconciliation.

    He is going to church, and even takes the NCP with him. I know God is speaking to him (he has said so); yet he still chooses sin over the Lord. I am praying and hurting, forgiving and loving, but just needed to know that this was not easy for him either. He tells me he loves me, will every day of his life and that he has a big hole in his chest; yet he can not seem to gather the strength to pull away from sin.

    Thank you…reading your testimony has eased my heart. I do not want my husband to remain in pain or to suffer, but knowing that he is not resting easy helps calm my fears.

  13. response by Acacia     

    I’ve been married three years and separated for six months. Standing with GOD, all things are possible and nothing is too hard for HIM! Your post just let me know that God is moving and taking over this battle. So it’s just a matter of time before my husband gives in to The Lord and returns home to me, and together we can re-dedicate our marriage and family to The Lord.

  14. response by Rachel     

    I have recently started visiting this site and I flock to it daily, absorbing the prayers and reciting them daily. And no matter what I see or hear, I know that God is going to do what He says. He is all I have to depend on!

  15. response by Karina     

    Thank you so much for posting this…I come and read it every time I feel like giving up or look at my circumstances, and as of today, I am giving my husband completely to God .. I can see that he is not at peace and I know God is working it all out for me and that He will do that for us and every covenant marriage!

  16. response by Melissa     

    This testimony really helped me, especially the part about it’s not about feelings…it’s about God’s promise. I’ve had a real problem with my feelings, so that’s really a big help to me. Thank you. And I’m claiming those Scripture verses and believe the Lord will restore our marriage. Bless you and your family.

  17. response by Kiwi     

    Thank you for this post. Someone just sent me this link and it helped me to understand what my husband is doing/feeling. I never thought I would be the type of person who would “stand” for marriage restoration and know that my spouse is in an adulterous relationship, but now God has changed me and my heart and I believe I must stand and pray for my husband because more than my marriage is at stake. I love him and am praying for him and the NCP (that was really hard) each day. And I believe that God will restore our marriages if we stand in Faith, Believing Him. All things are possible if we believe. So I’m standing in agreement for the restoration of every covenant marriage in Jesus’ name. Amen.

  18. response by Joseph     

    Stephanie, reading this was incredible to say the least! It’s SO, SO true about the prodigal, and I was one a long time ago as well. Thank you! God will wipe every tear from every eye. Standing FIRM in my faith has been the BEST journey through the most difficult times! Always stay strong in Christ and remember…”What would Jesus do!” Amen!

  19. response by Leigh     

    I have just recently been directed to the FAMM website in the midst of a two plus year ordeal and forced divorce. When I hear your testamony, I hear the words of my wayward husband saying all of the same things. And hearing of your restoration boosts my own hope that no matter how hard the heart and no matter how long the struggle, GOD IS STILL GOD AND HE IS EVEN MORE CONCERNED ABOUT OUR MARRIAGES THAN WE ARE!
    PLEASE remember me and my husband in your prayers. The Lord changed my hopeless, angry heart in an instant when my husband left and instilled a spirit of steadfastness in me, even when I felt like the injured party. So your experience and testimony gives me hope in a world that says “Move on and give up.” THANK YOU!!!

  20. response by Sarah     

    Thank you for writing this. I’m standing for my marriage and praying for my husband and the NCP as well (and for her marriage as well). I can see he’s struggling with his choices and it hurts to see him confused.

  21. response by Alexandra     

    I needed this too. My husband and the NCP just legalized their adultery last month, but I will not give up. Even in the natural, these “marriages” do not normally last, and that’s not even taking God and His Word into account!

  22. response by Monec     

    Praise the Lord! It’s so amazing when someone here in the Earthly Realm who you have never met pretty much tells you word for word what God has personally spoken and shown you in the spiritual Realm. Praise God!

    I’m still standing on God’s Word to bring my Covenant husband back from the far country. Meanwhile, as I wait, I share what God can and will do as if He’s already done it. The truth is that it has already been done for me–they just don’t see it yet. Many haven’t looked through Spiritual Eyes, but I have and your testimony explained exactly what I saw. Thank you for your obedience in sharing and confirming God’s Holy Word. Continue spreading your testimony and encouraging Covenant Spouses to take the ” narrow road” and Stand in the gap for their Covenant Spouses while they are away in the far country. God bless you.

  23. response by Jane     

    Thank you for your words of encouragement! After twenty-five years together and nineteen years of marriage, I’ve had no contact with my husband for ten months and he lives with the NCP. We have two children and this has been so hard, but I’m standing firm and believe God will restore my marriage and I’ll rejoice when that day comes. Please keep praying for me.

  24. response by Gen     

    God speaks to me through your testimonies. God is Sovereign!

  25. response by ALF     

    I just came across this website and I am so grateful! Thank you for your words of encouragement.

    My husband has been living with the NCP for four weeks now and sent me an email message last night, saying that he will call me today. So I needed to hear your testimony today so I’d know exactly how to express myself to him.

    I will stand with the LORD and fight for the restoration of my marriage. I will not allow satan to have the final word. In Jesus’ Name, AMEN!!!!

  26. response by Brian     

    I’m standing for my marriage to my wife of seven years, who left and moved in with her cousin. I came here looking for encouragement to keep standing and I got it!

    But it saddens me to see so many marriages in trouble and made me feel selfish, which I know is the root of so much sin. So I’ve given my wife and marriage to God and know that He is faithful and I’m not going to just focus on me and my family anymore. I’ve actually been inspired to start praying for all marriages; those that need to be restored and those that are headed that way. We all know the severe pain of being separated.

    Thank you, Stephanie, and thank you all. I just realized what I can do to help the kingdom of God. The devil has had a field day with marriages and it’s time for that to stop! I’ll be praying for you! Thank you!

  27. response by Sunshine     

    In the intro paragraph, it says that Proverbs 16:1 says that there is no wisdom or insight or plan that will succeed against the lord. That’s actually Proverbs 21:30. I was looking to read it where you said it was and it wasn’t there, so I just wanted to let you know so that others will know where to find it. .

  28. response by Linda Wattu     

    Thank you, Sunshine! I’m so familiar with that particular passage of Scripture and can’t believe I made such a mistake! So I truly appreciate you taking the time to read all Scripture references for yourself and that you’d also take the time to point out my mistake, which as you’ll see, I’ve corrected!

    Thanks again and may God richly bless you!
    Linda

  29. response by G. Johnson     

    I’m so glad God led your heart to publish this for all the souls He sends to search for His face. We are searching for a way to remain faithful to our vows while our prodigals are still in the pig pens of life, so I pray that God continues to use this site for many years to come. It seems that Satan is really going after the family and marriage. You wrote this in 2009 and still here in 2015, you are ministering to souls. May Yeshua bless you richly in every area of your life!

    Thank you so much!

  30. response by Stephanie     

    Thank you so much for sharing your testimony and encouraging me and so many others. I know that you wrote this years ago (around the time I got married), but every word still holds true. Thank you for allowing God to use you and speak through you. I pray your marriage has been restored.

  31. response by Ebony     

    Thank you sooo much for posting this!! God knows what we need when we need it!! I was contemplating giving up my stand this weekend…BUT GOD! HE’S INTENTIONAL! PRAISE HIS HOLY NAME!!!! I LOVE HIM!!!!

  32. response by Lorina     

    I have witnessed this in my spouse as well. And he’s now battling with the idea of how to break it off with the NCP and all the people he will hurt in the process.

  33. response by Jovana     

    Thank you so much for sharing this. It’s been hard for me to pray since the divorce, so everything you said was reassuring. Thank you so much for yielding to the Holy Spirit and presenting this much needed information.

  34. response by Mimi     

    Thank you for posting this. I was so tempted to stop standing for my marriage this weekend, and this brought me hope.

  35. response by Brian     

    I am new to this site, and want to know what NCP stands for. I understand who the NCP is, but don’t know what it means. Thank you!

  36. response by Linda Wattu     

    Brian, NCP stands for Non-Covenant Person. Hope that helps! :)

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