One of the most important things we have to get straight in our own hearts and minds when making a decision to stand for the restoration of our marriages is exactly why we’re standing. Most people initially answer the why question saying how much they love their spouse and how they just couldn’t imagine being with anyone else, or that they don’t believe in divorce. And those are all natural and understandable reasons to stand for the restoration of our marriages, but they probably aren’t good enough to endure everything that comes against us as we stand, including the passing of time and everything else that makes marriage restoration look impossible. Most standers started out standing for those exact reasons, but most of us eventually came to recognize that the only way to experience peace, strength, joy and victory in the Lord, while standing for the restoration of our marriages is by putting our faith and confidence in Jesus Christ, as we learn to walk in obedience to His Word, and stand for HIS Glory!

So we can certainly relate to 1 Peter 2:9, which says But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. And what encouragement and assurance we have in Isaiah 42:16, where God says I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.

However, really understanding John 15:1-8 is vitally important as we stand for the restoration of our marriages, because it says “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

This must be a message the Lord REALLY wanted to get across, because He laid it on the hearts of two of our members, who posted the following messages on the private websites last Friday afternoon and evening, without knowing the other had done so! So I thank the following FAM Fellowship members for allowing me to share their posts and responses here, because they certainly glorify the Lord and hold the key to being blessed and encouraged as we stand for the restoration of our marriages!

While feeling depressed and down last night, I decided to sit down and make a list of how God has been there for me over the past eighteen months. In the beginning it seemed I could not think of too many things. But once I got started, the list began to grow and I was truly amazed how God had given me so many opportunities to grow in Him. But that could be a whole other post! The common theme that summed up my list was my relationship with Jesus Christ, and I looked back at how my life and attitude toward my stand had changed over that period of time.
Originally I had focused my stand on what it would do for me (my selfishness), what I was missing and how my life and the life of my kids would be affected forever. I never thought the word divorced would describe me! How could this happen to people who were Christians and lived a “good” life? I even unloaded my self-righteous attitude onto my wife. For a period of time I let Satan control my thoughts and actions and did not give God the chance to intervene. My commitment to my marriage was not for the right reasons, although I loved my wife immensely.
Yes, I do love my wife and want to spend the rest of my life with her. What is more, I know that is what God wants for us also. The more I have grown in my relationship with Christ, the more important my remaining faithful to my marriage vows becomes, but not for my original reasons. The covenant marriage created by God should be stood for so that Jesus might be glorified. His faithfulness should be honored and praised; His power, grace and mercy should be magnified and proclaimed. He has helped me to have the unconditional love for my wife that He has for me; no matter what I did or said, He was right there with me at all times. He never gave up on me. And I must show the same kind of love to my wife.
So my faith is a powerful witness to others, especially to my wife and kids. Living for God has given me an inner peace that I did not have before. May our stand glorify God and may we be powerful witnesses to our families and those around us who are watching our situations. May we all be blessed as we stand with God for our marriages, and look forward to the future, when we are worshipping and praying with our spouses at our side!!

Isaiah 43:19 (NLT)
For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.

Philippians 3:13-14 (NLT)
13 No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it,[a] but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead,
14 I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

Response by Linda Wattu on June 9th, 2007 at 12:47 pm
Dan, this is such an important message! there’s no way we can stand victoriously for our marriages when we’re doing it for the wrong reasons, and the ONLY reason that pleases God is the glory of His beloved Son, Jesus Christ! And there’s NOTHING God won’t do for the glory of Jesus! And when we demonstrate that we will give Him the glory for the little things He does for us, which we do by sharing His praises and ministering support and encouragement (comfort) to others, He will most certainly move more quickly on our behalf! Why would He delay any glory for Jesus?! He wouldn’t!

Response by Janet in Maryland on June 9th, 2007 at 6:51 pm
Dan, God has done a mighty work in you. He is well aware of how much you have grown in Him, and He will certainly reward you for your love for Him and your obedience.
He sees you ministering to others and I know he is pleased. I am sure you also know how much we love you and are here for you too. May God continue to bless you as He works on the complete restoration of your marriage. Janet

Response by Diane on June 9th, 2007 at 7:55 pm
Thanks for this, Dan. It is so true; our stand is for the Glory of Jesus and there is no glory in divorce. You have grown so much in the past few months and it is my honor to be a witness to what God has done in you and for you. Keep it up; God will use you mightily and other people will be blessed by it. God will do this for us all. He has given us His promise and He does not lie. Stay encouraged, as you always encourage me. Hang in there and glad to hear the Dan we have grown to love back. Thank you, Lord. All glory to YOU. Diane

Response by Paula on June 9th, 2007 at 11:32 pm
Dan, you are right! It is all about God and bringing Him glory in every aspect of our lives. I thank God for the opportunities I’ve had to share with others who were separated or on the brink of divorce, and encourage them to give God a chance in their lives. I find so much peace in helping others. My husband was a pastor and many people knew us back then and some of them know I am standing now (I don’t discuss it with nay sayers), and one recently said “I admire you and what you’re doing, because I don’t know if I could.” I quickly reminded her that it wasn’t me, but God’s grace and mercy giving me the strength to walk out my calling. Our stand is a testament to others of the power of God to live above the ways of the world. Thanks for reminding us all of that in your post. I could relate to a lot of what you said. As my stand continues, the reasons change as well.

Response by Fran on June 10th, 2007 at 7:21 pm
Dan, I think your sentiment describes a lot of us. I’ve been standing for quite a while, although I’ve only been a part of FAM for a short while. In the beginning, I was so full of pride about being separated and the thought of divorce. That is definitely not God glorifying. We are getting out of our stands just what God intends. He allowed our circumstances for these very reasons. We are growing closer and closer to Him each and every day, with each and every test or trial. Stay encouraged. God is not finished with us yet. Fran

Response by Thursa on June 11th, 2007 at 10:45 am
I received an email from a friend who I had shared my husband’s homecoming with because she’s been there standing with me, and she responded by saying “Of course he’s home. Our purpose is to glorify God. Divorce does not glorify God, but the power and gift of restoration does!” God WILL use us and our testimonies to show His glory! It is our hope and faith that sustains us and helps us to persevere. We set our eyes to God and know He will restore us! We delight ourselves in Him and He will give us our hearts desires!!
This weekend I heard over and over about not being put to shame. Psalm 25:3 “No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame, but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse.” Our hope and faith is in our God and He will NOT put us to shame, He will let His glory shine brightly in us and our restorations!!!

While reading these scriptures today, I really feel the lord speaking directly to me: Philippians 3:12-4:1 (NIV)

I have been a born again Christian since August of 2005. However, just as stated in verse 12, Christ Jesus took hold of me in October of 2005 and the “light came on.” That was the day that God spoke to me through another stander in another state, who knew nothing about me. In HIS perfect timing (when I really needed it), he gave her a vision of a field of daisies to give to me. There is no way this woman would have known daisies are my favorite flower and that I would take a daisy over a diamond ring. That was my turning point.

But it’s been a struggle for me to take hold of what God’s word is telling me. This is where I truly believe the ill effects of past wrong decisions sometimes hinder me now. I have a tough time remembering what I am being taught in HIS word- His manuscript-my life line- my Bible. However, God knows my struggle to remember. He knows that I am pressing on day to day; pressing toward the goal; the prize (my daisies, the restoration of my family). But most importantly, my life; to live eternally with my heavenly father.

As I look back now almost 2 years ago, when God placed me on this journey (some of my fleshly decisions also helped place me here), I see that I have learned so much. The learning has allowed me to live out today, tomorrow and years to come; little by little, still searching for HIS truth, because I know I am to live by what HE has taught me from my “yesterdays.”

In verse 13, it is written that we are to forget what is behind and strain toward what is ahead. Forgetting failures, and knowing that I have now learned from my yesterdays, helps me forget my past, and now I am living a much more fulfilling life than I ever could have asked for. Not only has it helped me individually with certain issues, but it has also helped me with things that I used to hold against my husband. I CHOOSE to forget my spouse’s wrong doings, because I know God wants me to leave them behind. No, it has not always been easy to do, but after doing it day by day, it ends up becoming a very natural thing.

God is instructing us to join with others in following HIS example and that is exactly what we are doing here in this ministry. We are here to help each other learn HIS ways and to STAND FIRM in his WORD. By standing firm with each and every one of you as I learn, “WE” learn his powerful and miraculous ways.

Blessings and Love to each and every one of you. Jenn

Response by Paula on June 8th, 2007 at 7:45 pm
Jenn, our pastor preached from this text on Sunday. How appropriate. It is important for us to keep moving forward and not looking back. We can’t change or erase the past, but I often think of what God said about Job and that is “latter end was better than his beginning.” God has a way of rewarding us beyond our imagination for pressing forward in Him. He honors our commitment to him and our marriages. DO you know how much that pleases God! Many of the things you’ve shared have been my struggle too. The Lord has used Linda to help me see the areas that I need to improve and work on, and even in that, it’s a forward move, because I’m striving daily to be what God wants me to be. My actions helped me to be where I am too, and Satan loves to remind me. But, I’m going to learn how to consistently take those thoughts captive. You know Psalms talks about how our days were ordained and planned before we were even born. So now, even in this, I am still in God’s perfect will and his plan. And it is in this trial God will perfect that which concerns us. Isn’t that great news? Grace and Peace to you, Jenn, and thanks so much for sharing this message with the FAM family tonight.

Response by Diane on June 9th, 2007 at 11:46 am
Yes, Jenn, thanks for sharing. I often recite that verse of forgetting what lies behind and pushing forward to what Jesus has for me. We all have the same struggles to overcome and the good news is that with God all things are possible. He strengthens us to be able to do this. Thank you for this post. It touched me to remember this verse again today and let go of yesterday and look to what God has planned for me today. Be blessed. Diane

Response by Dan on June 9th, 2007 at 11:42 am
I meet a group for breakfast every morning, and they don’t understand my stand, but I don’t care. Anyway, I walk to and from breakfast, about a mile and a half each way. This morning I sang on the way home - “it just doesn’t matter” until the scriptures just poured out. God has things under control, His plans cannot be thwarted, and good things are going to happen for me from being obedient, having faith, believing and praising God. I know God knows what I have done, what my wife has done, and it just doesn’t matter to Him; He wants us restored and healed and He will not stop until that is where He has us. Thanks ladies! I praise God for the relationship I have with Him and the growth I have made in my closer walk with God. This would not have happened without some event from God- and so many other events could have been worse than what I have gone through. That’s another praise; that He spared me from worse trauma.

Response by Linda Wattu on June 9th, 2007 at 12:17 pm
Dan, that’s why I suggest to everyone NOT to discuss your stand for marriage restoration with anyone other than those you know for sure understand and support it. Otherwise, we just give the devil an opening into our hearts and minds, and he won’t miss such a great opportunity to bring us down; to kill, steal and destroy - and we know what he wants to kill, steal and destroy! And I’m glad reminding yourself that it doesn’t matter helped! There’s no way to keep going down the road with Satan’s wicked thoughts when we do that! That’s definitely taking those thoughts captive! And then we can make them obedient to Christ (the Word), just as you did! After awhile, the devil will just leave you alone, I promise! Look how he just slunk away after Jesus kept telling him “It is written…!” Remember to LOOK for God in EVERYTHING, and we can do that IF we really believe that God will work ALL THINGS to our good!

Response by Janet in Maryland on June 9th, 2007 at 6:32 pm
Amen and amen. Jenn, I am in agreement with everything you said here. I too had a hard time with some of the things my husband has done in the past. I held these things against him for quite some time. Then as I got more and more into the Word, which is one of the greatest things to come out of our separation, I read and re-read 1 Corinthians 13:5, love keeps no record of wrongs. I said to myself, hmmm, I am a Christian and I want to be obedient to the Word; I know I love my husband with all my heart and therefore, I cannot keep any record of wrongs. Then I let it all go and gave it to God. This has been liberating. I know you love your husband and so I am confident that you will get better and better at forgetting all past wrongs. God bless you and thank you for sharing. Janet

Response by Thursa on June 9th, 2007 at 7:00 pm
This is one of the verses I consider my life verse, Jenn! I’ve had to really take hold of it and apply it to myself!!! The verse reminds me that just as God has forgiven us and forgets our sins, we too are not supposed to look back on things we have done. God has forgotten it, so why do we bring back the memory of it. Satan does it to try to make us feel “unworthy” of the blessings and gifts God has for us. He tries to get us off track so we miss the blessings. And just as you mentioned, we must apply the same thoughts to our spouses and all others we deal with! Our goal is a heavenward mission and if Satan can take our eyes off of that goal by bringing up things that are forgotten…he will do it. Ask for forgiveness, RECEIVE the forgiveness or extend forgiveness and mean it…the press forward with your eyes on God!!! Thanks again, Jenn, for reminding me how important it is!!!

Our God is the ONLY one who CAN and WILL breathe life into dead marriages (Ezekiel 37:4-6and replace stony hearts with hearts of flesh (Ezekiel 11:19), and then direct those same hearts like water, wherever HE wants them to go (Proverbs 21:1)! And He’s the only one who CAN AND WILL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES to bring His will and purpose into being (Isaiah 46:11)! And the FAM family is blessed once again to witness that first hand as we celebrate yet another restored marriage!

So, I want to thank Robin for this awesome reminder of exactly WHO our God is, which she posted on the ladies’ private website yesterday! Since I didn’t recall hearing the name Jehovah-Gibbor before, I had to look it up and was really fascinated with what I discovered as a result! And since I thought everyone else might enjoy studying the information I found, here are links to two websites with information about the names of God:
1. List of Names, Meaning and Bible References
2. More Names and Historical Information

And the Bible reference for Jehovah-Gibbor at the first link, just happens to be to a passage of scripture I really love and have a personal affinity for, which is Isaiah 42:10-16 as follows:
Sing to the LORD a new song, his praise from the ends of the earth, you who go down to the sea, and all that is in it, you islands, and all who live in them. Let the desert and its towns raise their voices; let the settlements where Kedar lives rejoice. Let the people of Sela sing for joy; let them shout from the mountaintops. Let them give glory to the LORD and proclaim his praise in the islands. The LORD will march out like a mighty man, like a warrior he will stir up his zeal; with a shout he will raise the battle cry and will triumph over his enemies. “For a long time I have kept silent, I have been quiet and held myself back. But now, like a woman in childbirth, I cry out, I gasp and pant. I will lay waste the mountains and hills and dry up all their vegetation; I will turn rivers into islands and dry up the pools. I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.

AMEN! We serve a GREAT and MIGHTY God who WILL do exactly what His Word says He will do and we can’t ever forget that! If we do, we give Satan entrance into our lives and marriages, and he never misses the opportunities we give him to stir up strife, doubt and discouragement. And how awesome and exciting it is to read all the responses to Robin’s post! I know the Lord is pleased when He sees us testify of how He has worked in our lives and hearts this way, so keep it coming. It’s posts like this that lead to the Lord being glorified in our lives and marriages, just as in the restoration of yet another one of our members’ marriages last night! So be blessed and encouraged!

Dear Lord, thank you for the awesome testimonies of how you have worked in all of our hearts and lives and that we have the ability and freedom to express that for your glory. Thank you for choosing us in such a time as this and that you will be ever so faithful to complete the task to which we are all called! And how we thank you and give you all honor and glory for the restoration of Thursa’s marriage! We love you and praise your WONDERFUL name, Jesus, and it is in your name we pray. Amen.

WHAT A MIGHTY GOD WE SERVE!!!!!! Satan is such a fool. He really thinks that he can kill, steal, and destroy the plans of the Mighty One, but he is mistaken. He cannot get us to doubt the word of God at this point, because we have come to the realization that we are not wasting our time!!!! We know that we have come this far by faith; we know that the battle is already won, and we know that the word won’t return void. If God said it, then He will bring it to pass. Satan will try, but we must know that he is a liar and God’s word is true. Be encourage family, that while we wait, the fortresses of Jehovah Gibbor are at war in the heavenlies, fighting on our behalf. I have learned that when I ward off Satan with the word, God does an even mightier work in my situation. Although we know that, let us never forget that we are not wasting our time; our God is Awesome and capable of doing the impossible. Love, Robin

Response by Fran on June 7th, 2007 at 10:59 am
Robin, I agree that we are not wasting our time. This time is a time of refining for us. Just last night, as I was re-reading “The Battlefield of the Mind”, I was seeing how so much of what Joyce Meyer wrote about applied to me. I had read this book not to long ago and some of these things just went straight in and out of my head. But, this time around, I am seeing better how what she says applies to me. I had been looking at all that needed changing in my spouse; not really thinking that I needed that much change. Boy, have my eyes been opened… This time for me is a time for more and deeper self-examination. If God can reveal His answers to me, surely He can reveal the appropriate answers to my husband.

Although I am not perfect and will never be perfect, I am being perfected during this time of waiting. My waiting has changed from a time of passivity to a time of working things God’s way. I am full of joy. I am getting new revelation every day. God is at work in us all. He is making us into the persons that He desires for us to be. That has been my prayer for a very long time and I can see it happening little by little. Be blessed and encouraged. We are definitely not wasting our time.

Response by Janet in Maryland on June 7th, 2007 at 12:01 pm
Amen and amen Robin. There is nothing that Satan can throw at us that is mightier than our God and His Word. We just have to keep believing. Jesus’ name is the name above all names. He is so very worthy of all our praise. Satan you are defeated. We serve but one God and to Him be all the glory. As we stand, we are definitely not wasting our time, because Romans 5:3-5 says, “…… we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” We will keep on pressing on. The God we serve has us covered.

Response by Thursa on June 7th, 2007 at 1:00 pm
Amen Robin!!! NOTHING for God is a waste! In this time I am waiting on nothing but my Dear Heavenly Father and He is so faithful and loving that He spends and fills each and every day and moment with me growing and enriching my life for Him!!! As the well known Sunday School song goes, “He’s got the WHOLE world in His hands.” That includes me and my heart, I have no fear and am blessed and encouraged to wait on Him!

Response by Diane on June 7th, 2007 at 1:12 pm
I see this time as one of getting closer to God, because I never had HIM in my life as Lord and Savior before. I believed in God, but never knew HIM. I have said many times that this has been a good thing, because without it I would still be the same. I didn’t realize the stuff I had in me that I needed to let go of. Enjoy the journey and cling to our Father. I think we all started this with “God, fix our spouse.” and were shocked at all He revealed. If He can do it for us He will do it for our spouses. Thanks for this, Robin. Nothing is bigger than God and nothing is impossible for HIM who created all. We need to do our part, which is to BELIEVE and OBEY. God will do the rest.

Response by Paula on June 8th, 2007 at 7:05 pm
Robin..all I can say is your post ministered directly to ME! WOW! Did I need to hear and be reminded of that today. Satan has been trying EXTRA hard to defeat me and if it weren’t for Linda sharing the truth of God’s word with me, he’d have me. But, I thank God for his grace and mercy and post like these that help keep me on track.

Faith in God is being totally dependent on Him and having a willingness to do His will; with complete and humble obedience; and readiness to do whatever he calls us to do. Faith is being sure and certain that God is who He says He is and will do what He says He will do. When we believe that God will fulfill His promises, even though we can’t see them materializing yet, we demonstrate true faith. [John 20:24-31 (NLT) 24 One of the twelve disciples, Thomas (nicknamed the Twin), [a] was not with the others when Jesus came. 25 They told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he replied, “I won’t believe it unless I see the nail wounds in his hands, put my fingers into them, and place my hand into the wound in his side.” 26 Eight days later the disciples were together again, and this time Thomas was with them. The doors were locked; but suddenly, as before, Jesus was standing among them. “Peace be with you,” he said. 27 Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and look at my hands. Put your hand into the wound in my side. Don’t be faithless any longer. Believe!” 28 “My Lord and my God!” Thomas exclaimed. 29 Then Jesus told him, “You believe because you have seen me. Blessed are those who believe without seeing me.”
30 The disciples saw Jesus do many other miraculous signs in addition to the ones recorded in this book. 31 But these are written so that you may continue to believe[b] that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing in him you will have life by the power of his name.]
Faith is a gift from God. [Ephesians 2:8-9 (NLT) 8 God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. 9 Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.] Faith is given to each of us when we accept Jesus Christ into our lives, but it is up to each of us to develop that faith and do something with it. Even a tiny seed of faith is enough, if it is alive and growing. Knowing Jesus is with us in our suffering and that someday He will put an end to the pain, helps us to grow in our faith.
How do we grow and strengthen in our faith? We first need to hear the Word of God, believe that it’s true and build our faith upon it. As we stay in the Word, faith comes subconsciously. It comes through scripture reading and study, worshipping, prayer, praise and actively following Jesus.
Bayless Conley discusses three levels of faith. The first faith is “no faith”. [Mark 4:37-41 (NLT) 37 But soon a fierce storm came up. High waves were breaking into the boat, and it began to fill with water. 38 Jesus was sleeping at the back of the boat with his head on a cushion. The disciples woke him up, shouting, “Teacher, don’t you care that we’re going to drown?” 39 When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Silence! Be still!” Suddenly the wind stopped, and there was a great calm. 40 Then he asked them, “Why are you afraid? Do you still have no faith?” 41 The disciples were absolutely terrified. “Who is this man?” they asked each other. “Even the wind and waves obey him!”] That’s when we believe God is asleep, disinterested, disconnected and doesn’t care about our situation in life. If we indeed have been saved, we have faith and having “no faith” is impossible. [1 Peter 5:7 (NLT) Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.]
The next level of faith is “little faith”. [Matthew 6:30-34 (NLT) 30 And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?
31 “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33 Seek the Kingdom of God[a] above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. 34 “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.] That’s a worried faith. We believe God cares but tend to take over for God, trying to make His promises come true through efforts that are not in line with His directions and guidance. If we ask God for something, and we don’t wait - it shows lack of trust in Him. When we don’t keep our eyes on Jesus’ power our own inadequacies begin to surface and we suffer. Bayless uses a great analogy; “we pull tomorrow’s clouds over today’s sunshine!”
God wants us to work toward “great faith”, which is the third level of faith. That’s when we say, ”Lord, Your Word is enough!” [Matthew 8:5-10 “Lord, my young servant[b] lies in bed, paralyzed and in terrible pain.” 7 Jesus said, “I will come and heal him.” 8 But the officer said, “Lord, I am not worthy to have you come into my home. Just say the word from where you are, and my servant will be healed. 9 I know this because I am under the authority of my superior officers, and I have authority over my soldiers. I only need to say, ‘Go,’ and they go, or ‘Come,’ and they come. And if I say to my slaves, ‘Do this,’ they do it.” 10 When Jesus heard this, he was amazed. Turning to those who were following him, he said, “I tell you the truth, I haven’t seen faith like this in all Israel!] We trust God to do exactly what He has promised. God’s Word says it and that is all the evidence we need. We stand on the truth of His Word. So it doesn’t matter what the world says, or what our circumstances look like. We just stay with His Word until our faith turns it into something we can see, and we focus on God and His sufficiency, His care and abundant love for us. [1 Timothy 6:12 (NLT) Fight the good fight for the true faith. Hold tightly to the eternal life to which God has called you, which you have confessed so well before many witnesses.] [Hebrews 11:1 (NLT) Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.]
We should always pursue “great faith”. No one knows more about faith than Jesus; He is the developer of faith, so we need to listen to Him. And the Word shows us what great faith can do, and throughout the Old and New Testaments we see results of each of the three levels of faith. If we focus and rely on God’s faithfulness of the past, we can face our storms, temptations, trials callings and obedience with confidence and “great faith”.
God calls us to be active in our obedience. Growing in faith is a daily process that constantly renews our trust in Jesus, and God wants us to share our strong faith with the world. We, as standers for our marriages, are especially called to share our faith as it pertains to God’s will for our covenant marriages to be healed and restored according to His promises. And if we don’t, we are not doing Christ’s work in the world.
Lord, I pray that each of us will continue to grow in faith; that we would be strengthened by Your mighty power to demonstrate our complete and undying faith in You, the creator and restorer of marriage, the one who hates divorce, forgives our sins and gives us eternal life. In Your Precious Son’s Name, Amen

In the past week, we’ve had lots of posts and conversations about waiting, so it seems the topic would get old after awhile, but I have a feeling that’s not likely to ever happen! There’s just too much to learn about the power and importance of waiting, especially when we’re standing for the restoration of our marriages. Every day this week, I’ve received one or two email messages from FAM Fellowship members with devotionals or messages from other ministries related to waiting, so this is obviously a message the Lord really wants us to get! And what awesome testimonies He’s provided in the lives of some of the fellowship members to help make the point!

Even though I wrote about why we wait only last week, based on what I’ve seen the Lord doing in just the past few days, it’s very clear that one of the most important reasons for waiting is that it’s probably the only way God can move us from simple faith and belief to absolute trust and confidence; the only way we can experience the victory and abundance described in John 10:10 (AMP), where Jesus said The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows).

Unfortunately, I haven’t yet met a stander who didn’t have to go through a lot of hard times and waiting to get to the place of truly trusting God, and having absolute confidence that He will indeed DO exactly what His Word says He will do! But the good news is that none of the standers I know, including me, who have truly learned to rest in the Lord by putting all of their trust and confidence in Him regret what it took to get us there; and that’s really saying something! But it just confirms what Jeremiah 17:7-8 says, which is “But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” And it’s only through our faith in Jesus that we have the confidence we need to approach the throne of God with boldness, just as Ephesians 3:12 (NLT) tells us; Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God’s presence.

In addition to the three FAM Fellowship members I mentioned in yesterday’s SOF post, who recently shared their testimonies of how the lord pursued and wooed them after they gave up on the restoration of their marriages, earning their trust and confidence in the process; He just provided two more testimonies from FAM Fellowship members revealing how our trust and confidence are developed in Him as we wait. This is a remarkable testimony of how God works and how He moves to get us to the plan HE has for our lives and how serious He is about using the gifts and anointing He gives us for His purposes and glory!

Alex is a very gifted writer, as regular visitors to the site know by the many wonderful and thought provoking messages she’s shared with all of us since joining the ministry. But she recently encountered very unexpected financial woes when her state made radical changes to their mental health program, which drastically decreased her income without much notice. We were discussing that not more than a few weeks ago, when she asked me to pray for the Lord to give her guidance about what she wanted to do. So I asked her what she wanted to do. She said she knew it sounded silly, but what she’d really like to do is write lyrics for songs. But I didn’t think that was silly at all and I encouraged her, because I’m a VERY firm believer and testament to the fact that God gives us talents for His glory, and that’s how He wants us to use them. For instance, even as a teenager, I knew my God given talent was writing. I always won first place in every contest I entered as a kid, and often got one or two additional honorable mentions as well. But I couldn’t write unless it was about something I felt passionately about. And throughout most of my adult life, I’d ask God how I was supposed to be using my talent for His glory and I’d try to think of ways to use my writing for Him, but nothing ever felt right; there wasn’t ever anything that I felt passionate enough about to write about. I was often even frustrated about my failure to use what I knew was a gift from God for Him in some way, but I just couldn’t figure out how I was supposed to do that. Hopefully, I’m making up for all that lost time now! Anyway, the following is a praise report Alex posted on the ladies’ private website yesterday:

“I again need to praise God, because His plans for my life are unfolding in ways I never could have imagined. It’s like the scripture says “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…” (Ephesians 3:20)

I have always enjoyed writing-poems, stories, and essays, but I had never considered making a career of it. When God got my attention 6 years ago and I started drawing closer to Him, my writing changed dramatically-particularly my poems. The stuff that came pouring out of me surprised me and I felt in my spirit that I could one day write lyrics, though I can’t read music. My mother-in-law read some of my newer material and told me she felt that I was to write music one day. And then she said, “This is a confirmation for you, isn’t it?” I had not revealed to her my desire to write music, but the Holy Spirit did! That was years ago and I have continued to write, but never knew how to proceed.

My current career is in mental health, but my state has really struggled under mental health care reform for the last several years. As a result, my rate of pay and my hours are being cut and I have felt the pinch in my pocketbook. It was real work for me to not be discouraged, and I wondered what God was up to, as I love my job. I know God is bringing every aspect of my life, including finances, under his divine order, but I wasn’t thrilled to be almost out of a job, and I felt the need to take on something part time. So I got a job waitressing this past week, so that I could earn some tips and because it’s one of the few jobs that’s flexible and that I could leave without burning bridges should I be able to get more clients. God reminded me of my desire to write music and what he spoke to me all those years ago. Growing in faith is important to me, so I sent some material in to a company in Nashville that markets contemporary Christian music, where a friend of mine has a connection. I was waiting to hear whether they were willing to help me make a demo and what kind of feedback they had for the lyrics themselves. This is where God does above and beyond what we can think or imagine. I got a letter yesterday from a company representative who asked me if I would be willing to sign on with a contract!! I was advised that the music could sound “canned”, so it was recommended that I find a professional co-writer to help put the lyrics to melody. Even though the Holy Spirit spoke to me about this 5 years ago, oh me of little faith just kind of buried it as a nice, but impractical dream. So all of you with your God-given dreams…bring them out, dust them off, ask Him to use your dreams and your talents for his glory and then watch out!

If he had not moved me out of my comfort zone by creating problems with my job and our finances, I would not have pursued this at all. God sometimes has to shake us up a little to make us see that we can have His “best” and not settle for what seems “good” or “safe”.”

Now that’s a pretty remarkable testimony of how God works and how He moves us to a place of trusting Him and putting our confidence in Him, but I don’t think that’s the end of the story, because, even though Alex doesn’t know about this yet, since I was unable to reach her by phone today due to her new work schedule (so she’ll be learning about this by reading it here!), I very seriously doubt that the call I got early this morning from another FAM Fellowship member who was unaware of Alex’s testimony and praise report, was just a coincidence! Jennifer called to tell me how the Lord was working in so many amazing ways in her life, and I sat in total awe and amazement as I heard her testimony unfold!

About four years ago, the Lord gave Jennifer a vision of herself in a music ministry, using her singing gift for His glory. He even gave her a vision of a flyer with her picture on it and she recalls that it even said “in the midst of the trial” on it, which meant nothing to her at the time. But beyond getting an excellent quote for the cost of making a demo CD, she never pursued it; thinking it just wasn’t possible or practical. Huh, when is what God asks us to do ever very practical! To make a long story shorter, her marital problems and divorce drastically changed her life and things with her husband became very bitter and angry, and she didn’t always react to the situation in a very God glorifying manner. In fact, Jennifer is the FAM Fellowship member I mentioned who called me last month, after falling away for awhile before the Lord got her attention. And since then she has seen Him working in ways far beyond anything she could ever ask or imagine, just as Alex said! Anyway, she found herself in quite a pickle, because of delays getting child support after she insisted on making her husband pay it through the child support system instead of directly to her, which he had been doing! In addition, over the past months, she had tried to work, but something always came up making it impossible for her to continue – either transportation or child care issues. She had even tried to go back to school to become a nurse, but had problems doing that too. God was putting up road blocks, or as I usually say, he was closing doors! Then she remembered the vision the Lord had given her about a ministry in music, and started praying about that and decided to step out on faith to see what happened. On the very same day Alex was offered a song writing contract, Jennifer had her picture taken and created flyers to help promote her new ministry. And she prayed for the Lord’s guidance and provision for additional sound tracks and the sound equipment, etc. needed to do what she was now feeling very strongly led by the Lord to do. Then yesterday morning she received an unexpected financial gift from her father, which she took as confirmation that she was on the right track! I didn’t even know that Jennifer was a singer, so I asked her to sing something for me, and I was floored! She didn’t sound anything like she sounds! But then I guess that’s the way it is with really good singers! And one of the reasons this is all so exciting for me is that one of my long range plans for FAM Ministries has always been to help mothers get back on their feet in times of crisis when their husbands leave and they aren’t able to support themselves and kids adequately. I always envisioned sending in a ministry team to help stabilize women emotionally and financially in the days of crisis immediately after their husbands first leave (many do leave their wives and kids in a real financial mess). Anyway, I felt the Holy Spirit lay it on my heart to help Jennifer get her ministry launched, so FAM Ministries is going to help her get her CD’s made and help with some other things she needs to do to get started, and I’m really excited about that. Due to personal financial challenges, this is a really strange time for the Lord to put that on my heart, but as I told Jennifer, she can give back to the ministry when she’s able…that’s what God means for us all to do anyway. So I have no doubt about doing this to help her do what the Lord has obviously called her to do and I have no doubt FAM will be blessed too, because of the trust and confidence I have in the Lord. But as I told Jennifer, singing other performers’ music isn’t nearly as good as being able to sing original songs, and since she also sings contemporary Christian music, I want to see if she and Alex can get together, especially since it’s not very likely that it’s just a coincidence that they both had visions so many years ago and both finally got around to DOING something about it at the exact same time! Now, instead of closed doors, I have no doubt both Alex and Jennifer are going to see nothing but opened doors from now on, because they’ve made a commitment to put their trust and confidence in the Lord and use the gifts and anointing He has given them for His glory! How awesome!

Hopefully, the next time we’re discouraged and disheartened by the waiting, we’ll remember the testimonies of these “real life” people and recall that God ALWAYS has a purpose for it, and that His purposes and plans are always good, just as Jeremiah 29:11 (AMP) promises; For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome.

Several fellowship members mentioned Joyce Meyer’s TV broadcast message this morning, which was about faith and trusting God with confidence, and since it and the other two messages in the series cover so much of what we’ve been talking about in the ministry lately, here are links to all three messages, which I encourage everyone to watch and study. Be blessed and encouraged!

Trusting God - Part I

Trusting God - Part II

Trusting God - Part III

Regular visitors to the website know how excited I tend to get when I see the Lord working on a particular theme; when the same topic comes up over and over again, repeatedly confirming the point God is trying to get across. Well, we’ve certainly had a theme at work in the ministry the past few days and it is very clearly complete surrender leads to God’s peace and contentment in all circumstances…THEN GOD WORKS MIRACULOUSLY! God is really on the move in our midst again, so I can’t wait to see what happens next!

As with all things, working in marriage restoration ministry has it’s ups and downs, and one of the greatest disappointments for me personally is seeing any of the FAM Fellowship members fall away; wrongly thinking that their marriage is beyond salvation and restoration and giving up on God. But if we don’t receive the faith and understanding needed in our spirit through the power of God’s Word and the Holy Spirit, we just won’t have the grace and anointing needed to withstand everything the devil brings against us to deceive us into believing that, which causes doubt and discouragement. So when that happens, there’s nothing to do about it other than pray and trust that seeds of truth (God’s Word) were planted and that they will bring forth a harvest at some time in the future. And that’s exactly what happened both yesterday and today!

One of the earliest FAM Fellowship members I hadn’t heard from in months called yesterday, and we talked for a very long time. She called to thank me for the things she had learned through the ministry and to update me on how the Lord has been working in her heart and life and in her relationship with her husband. As shared in two messages posted by other members on the private websites yesterday and today, she finally realized that she had to COMPLETELY surrender everything to God and agree to do things HIS way, because the consequences of not doing so had in fact become very dangerous and costly. It was such a blessing to hear her testimony of God’s amazing grace, mercy and faithfulness; how He continued to speak to her and woo her, even though she was not living in any way that would possibly please Him. But when He got her attention, He REALLY got it, and she FINALLY surrendered everything to Him and made a decision to do things HIS way no matter what! And she said that she couldn’t believe how it seemed that the very minute she made that decision, God started working in her husband’s heart too! It’s a very long testimony, but the bottom line is that she is now firmly and confidently standing for her marriage NO MATTER WHAT, and TRUSTING that God WILL restore it! In just a matter of a couple of weeks, the Lord has totally changed her relationship with her husband from one of two people filled with anger and rage, unforgiveness and bitterness into one of two people who now understand and appreciate how special they are to each other as they experience and enjoy genuine friendship and companionship again! And that all started when she humbled herself and shared with her husband everything the Lord had revealed to her about how much she had hurt him and the “baggage” she had brought into their marriage. She is very much in awe of what she’s seen the Lord do, and most of all, the peace and contentment she now has because she let it all go and is ready to do and accept whatever God’s will is for her life. She said one thing that just totally blows her away is how God REALLY changes hearts, which she knows He did for her and which He is now doing for her husband…and how fast things can totally turn around! That’s why it’s SO important to wait, because God is ALWAYS working, even when we can’t see it, and when the time is right, what He has been doing behind the scenes will be revealed and we won’t believe it. But if we give up, we’ll never see it. That doesn’t mean that it wasn’t done; just that we didn’t wait long enough for it to be revealed.

Then again today, another one of the earlier FAM Fellowship members that I hadn’t heard from in a long time, called to update me on how the Lord has been working In her life and in her relationship with her husband. Her testimony was very similar in that she finally realized that she HAD to let everything go, and that she couldn’t believe the peace she found when she did and how the Lord had totally changed her in the process. And, just as with the woman who called yesterday, she said she couldn’t believe how her husband’s attitude toward her changed miraculously just as soon as she let things go and decided to stop trying to “manage” everything herself! She wanted to share with me that for the first time in a long time, they were on the phone today, laughing and joking with each other, which she just couldn’t believe! This was another relationship where she had done a GREAT deal of damage – even to the point of her husband accusing her of attempted murder!

So an important lesson learned and proven by these calls, in addition to another one just like them last month, is that GOD’S GRACE IS SUFFICIENT!!! If we don’t give up, no matter how bad things look, God CAN and WILL turn things around IN HIS TIME! So not waiting, giving up on God, is the one thing that can keep our marriages from being restored. But when we surrender our will and put all of our trust in God, we will experience peace and be content to wait, just as Dan and Thursa attest to in the following posts, which they shared on the private websites yesterday and today respectively, for which I appreciate their permission to share here. As I consider the testimonies of the two ladies I talked to yesterday and today, and what Dan and Thursa have shared, I’m reminded of Matthew 11:28-29, where Jesus bids us “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. That certainly sounds like confirmation that if we surrender completely to Jesus Christ, we will know the peace and contentment that comes only from an intimate relationship with Him, and there’s certainly no better way to be blessed and encouraged!

This past Saturday, I attended graduation celebrations for two of my nieces. And one year ago, I attended the graduation celebration for my son. What a difference a year makes - and a closer walk with God!
My son’s high school graduation celebration last year was held in conjunction with several other boys - perhaps about 10, and I had just moved out of our house two weeks before the event. It was held at a bar and grill in our town, and what should have been an exciting and wonderful celebration was a dreaded and horrible experience for me. I felt completely out of place, as my wife flitted around the party like nothing was wrong. Yet, all of our friends and family knew the situation. I ended up “coping” with it by drinking too much and leaving early to avoid further suffering and pain. But before I left, I some how ended up with my wife’s purse! Being a little soused, I noticed her cell phone in her purse, and took it out. Something whispered to me, and I don’t think it was the Holy Spirit, but the jealousy that was raging through me at that point; and I rang the NCP’s number. I didn’t say a word, and just hung up when he answered. I guess I just wanted him to know that I, and not he, was at my son’s graduation party with my wife. Well, in all actuality, I was not with my wife either. Of course, you might well imagine how that all turned out; the phone call was not the wisest decision I ever made. Although I may get the giggles thinking about it now, I certainly don’t recommend anyone doing anything like that!
I’m sharing this now, because this weekend I realized how much I have grown in the spirit and my relationship with God. I am not where I need to be, but thank God I am not where I was, and I am on my way to being what He wants me to be! I have learned to say no to my “self” and yes to God. I had God’s love in my heart, but it was buried under personal ambitions, cares, and problems. I was trying to take care of my problems instead of letting God do it. In order to be healed I had to have a listening, receptive heart or I would not have seen any measure of restoration or any other of God’s blessings in my life.

And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.
Romans 5:5 (New Living Translation)

Disappointment would have always been the norm if my eyes were on men and not my Lord. God, and only God, can restore what has been lost, because it takes His miracle power to do it. I released God to work when I released my faith in Him. But I had to surrender to the will of God, which is to restore and heal the covenant marriage He put together. Dugh…what took me so long?
Well, that is where I have grown and learned. Believing, trusting, and being obedient to God was, and is not easy for me. However, I have come to believe from the scriptures, that Jesus is the answer for all things. He goes out ahead of us and makes a way for us.

5 “Is it not my family God has chosen?
Yes, he has made an everlasting covenant with me.
His agreement is arranged and guaranteed in every detail.
He will ensure my safety and success.
2 Samuel 23:5 (New Living Translation)

When something in life looks impossible or unpleasant, Jesus is there to pave the way for us to move forward. But I had to put serious effort into studying the Word if I intended to get anything out of it, and I have truly discovered that the more I invest in His Word, prayer, and worship the more He is there for me. God can’t reveal things to me if I do not make myself available to Him. So I have learned to submit myself to His will as He reveals it to me. (See 2 Samuel 22:19-37 below)
As I reread about Mary in Luke and how the angel came to her about the virgin birth, I saw how readily she was willing to agree with God’s promise and accept it. And then the miracle happened. So what I face today requires me to make a decision to agree with God and His promises and then expect the Holy Spirit to bring it to pass; thus our miracles! God’s strength is made available to the believing heart, and as we believe, He brings us to places we could never reach on our own, although I almost died trying!!

34 Mary asked the angel, “But how can this happen? I am a virgin.”
35 The angel replied, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the baby to be born will be holy, and he will be called the Son of God.
Luke 1:34-35 New Living Translation (NLT)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
Proverbs 3:5 (New Living Translation)

The power of prayer is for everyone. If we do our part, God is going to do His part every time! And we certainly know that our prayers for our marriages to be restored are indeed aligned with His will. So the more we read and understand the Word, the more we come to know God’s will, because His Word is a revelation of what it is God wants us to do. Prayer will not reach beyond His will, which is why it’s so important to understand what His will for us is. Then at the moment we pray, we are to believe that we will receive what we prayed for; not when circumstances look different; not at some point in the future, but when we pray and ask. God is there right then and has sent angels with the answer. We just have to be patient and wait for His timing, just as we have seen over and over in the FAM family.

14 And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him.
15 And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for.
1 John 5:14-15 (New Living Translation)

As I looked around at the people at the celebrations this weekend, I was so sorrowful as I recognized the number of families who have been ravished by divorce; moms and dads sitting at different tables with new spouses, and the kids going back and forth from one “family” to the other. It broke my heart. But I was overcome with relief, because of my God, who is in control of my life and my marriage. It was as if God was pointing out to me that I must not succumb to Satan and allow him to destroy my family and my marriage. It was almost peaceful! I cannot believe the place God has brought me to, and I encourage everyone, no matter where you are in the process, to fight for your marriage. And more importantly, fight for what God has promised you; He wants His best for us and our loving spouses!!

19 They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress, but the Lord supported me.
20 He led me to a place of safety; he rescued me because he delights in me.
21 The Lord rewarded me for doing right; he restored me because of my innocence.
22 For I have kept the ways of the Lord;
23 I have followed all his regulations; I have never abandoned his decrees.
24 I am blameless before God; I have kept myself from sin.
25 The Lord rewarded me for doing right. He has seen my innocence.
26 “To the faithful you show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity.
27 To the pure you show yourself pure, but to the wicked you show yourself hostile.
28 You rescue the humble, but your eyes watch the proud and humiliate them.
29 O Lord, you are my lamp. The Lord lights up my darkness.
30 In your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall.
31 “God’s way is perfect. All the Lord’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.
32 For who is God except the Lord? Who but our God is a solid rock?
33 God is my strong fortress, and he makes my way perfect.
34 He makes me as surefooted as a deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights.
35 He trains my hands for battle; he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow.
36 You have given me your shield of victory; your help[a] has made me great.
37 You have made a wide path for my feet to keep them from slipping.
2 Samuel 22:19-37 (New Living Translation)

I would like to first give God praise and honor in the wonderful ways He has shown His awesome power in my life. As Linda pointed out to me earlier today, we have come a long way from the beginning. I Praise God for every small and large step I have taken on that way. I thank God that He has taken every single step with me as I go. In fact, He hasn’t just taken the step with me, He has given me the legs and feet of strength, the courage and the spiritual armor I need to push forward to receive the tremendous blessings He has waiting for me. I am truly blessed to still have my entire family with me in my home. With that, I have had my own unique challenges and tests, which God continues to work out with me, as He shows me how I am to act and be in order for His glory to shine through me. I stumble, but I am so thankful that each and every time, God is there to pick me up, forgive me, put my tears in a bottle and then take my hand and lead me on to the next step. It brings tears to my eyes even now to think how unworthy I am of all the love and grace He continues to pour out on me. The only way I can even begin to show my love and appreciation to Him is to offer myself in complete surrender to Him. His ways are so far better than any of my ways. And I look forward to the opportunity I’ll have to share how my tests have become my complete marriage restoration testimony. I hope I am able to share it with many people, so they all may see God’s unfailing love for each of His children.

Today, I know God has answered prayers through a phone call my husband had with the NCP. I have no idea what was said or developed in that conversation; nor do I need to know. I only know about it because of a brief text my husband sent telling me they had talked. With Linda’s help and keen listening to the Holy Spirit (Thank you again, Linda), I did not respond at all to the text, and God has sent an overwhelming comfort to me in the last few minutes. The Holy Spirit has recalled many of my recent prayers and has just given me comfort that God is working and answering just as I have asked. I have peace in knowing that God’s grace IS sufficient for me. He has again taken my hand and said, “Look to me my child, for I will set your paths straight.”

Over the last day, the Holy Spirit has recalled to me over and over and OVER again Philippians 4:11-12 “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Just in the last few minutes, I now see the relevance and why I would need to hear that exact verse. Just as Paul found the “secret”, I too feel I have learned the “secret.” God’s grace is sufficient for me!!! I am completely content in my situation in waiting on God for the complete restoration of my marriage. My wait is not like being at the doctor’s office: uneventful and seemingly a waste of time. The wait I have in God is one of the most precious times in my life. So I praise and thank God that He has me right where I need to be; in His divine waiting room. I am learning so much about the unconditional love God has for me, and I want to obey Him and allow for His glory to shine in me. This is the secret; my secret to contentment is that His grace is sufficient! So I am willing and very content to wait on God and His perfect plan and timing!!!

One of the greatest hurdles to overcome as we stand for the restoration of our marriages is time, because it’s too easy to get tired and discouraged and want to give up waiting. Sadly, that apparently means we consider everything going on around us more credible than the Word of God, which must break our Lord’s heart. And even though we had a lot of great discussion about waiting in FAM Chat last Friday night, based on some private conversations today, it appears that we need to discuss it even more; because knowing why we wait and what to do while we wait are very important, but not nearly as important as understanding HOW to wait.

The reason waiting is so difficult is because we are trying to stand for our marriages in and of our own strength and ability, but in John 15:5, Jesus told us why that doesn’t work. He said “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. Yet, on the other hand, Philippians 4:13 says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. And 2 Corinthians 12:9 says But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. So God doesn’t expect us to have what it takes to stand for our marriages without Him, and Psalm 37:4-6, gives us the key to victoriously standing in the strength and grace of the Lord; it says Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

Obviously, we can’t rely on our own strength and ability to stand for the restoration of our marriages. Not only do we not have the power or ability to change our spouses; we don’t even have what it takes to stand the wait without the Lord. But any time God calls us to do something, He gives us everything we need to DO it and to get through it; if He calls us to it, He’ll get us through it. So that means we have to rely on God just to stand and Jesus told us very clearly how that’s possible in John 14:16-18 (NASB, which says “I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you..

As the Lord is ALWAYS so faithful to do, He provided additional confirmation for Friday’s SOF post and our chat Friday night, and answers for some of the questions that came up in several conversations with FAM Fellowship members today, in Charles Stanley’s TV broadcast message Sunday, titled Help is on the Way. The above link is to his sermon outline, where you can also watch or listen to the message, which I strongly encourage, because it’s a great study of who the Holy Spirit is and what He does. And at the end of the message Dr. Stanley discusses waiting, which he agrees is one of the most important principles for us as Christians. So listen to this important message and learn HOW TO WAIT, and be blessed and encouraged, because as Dr. Stanley said, help is on the way when we ask for it!

A little after 6:00am this morning, Bob Steinkamp sent out the following urgent prayer request for Charlyne. You can add your well wishes and prayers as a response and I’ll send a link to this post to Bob and Charlyne, which I’m sure will bless them greatly, along with the many, many prayers and well wishes they’ll be receiving from others. This couple has been such a blessing to all of us, and now we can do something very significant and meaningful in return, by coming together in prayer for Charlyne’s speedy recovery and for Bob’s strength during this time, and for the Lord’s glory, love and goodness to shine forth for all to see.

“Charlyne is enroute to the hospital via EMS x in respiratory distress.
Your prayers would be appreciated. Thanks for praying,
Bob Steinkamp”

Dear Lord, we know you love this woman with such a deep and abiding love, and she has served you so well and so faithfully, so we pray for your grace, mercy and favor on her right now. We ask you to touch her with your healing hand, because your Word tells us that by every stripe on the back of our precious Savior, we are healed. Give the doctors and all those associated with her care wisdom and the knowledge to treat her condition as needed for a speedy recovery. And, dear Lord, we pray for peace and strength for Bob. We know he loves his precious wife so. And we pray for Charlyne’s family too, Lord. Be with them all at this time. And we thank you now that you WILL be glorified even in this. There’s no doubt Charlyne and Bod will now have many more opportunities to witness to others of your marvellous glory, which we know they won’t miss. So we thank you for keeping Charlyne and her family in the palm of your loving and protective hand and we thank you that she will have a very speedy recovery and be back to the fun summer she was looking forward too real soon. And it is in your most powerful name we pray, Jesus. Amen.

Thanks to all for your prayers and well wishes for Bob and Charlyne. As always, our God is so faithful! Here’s Bob’s update from around eleven o’clock this morning!

“Thank you for your prayers for Charlyne early Saturday morning. You have no idea how much standers mean to us. When this health crisis was happening, our living room filled with paramedics, I was thinking, “I need to get standers praying.”
Charlyne and I give God the glory and the praise that she has been discharged from the emergency room, and is home again. AS she got into our daughter’s car, still wearing hospital wrist bands and bandages where IV’s had been, Charlyne’s first words were, “The devil is defeated.” (How I pray that you could learn to live like that, claiming victory not only in your marriage, but in everything the Enemy throws into your path.)

Charlyne awoke shortly after 5:30 A.M. Saturday unable to breathe. She could not speak, but communicated by shaking her head. 9-1-1 was called while she gasped for air.
Last night my wife attended a graduation party, where she ate Fritos, a snack she enjoys, but to which we suspect she has an allergy. That food combined with a cold she has, combined with her standard medication, on top of antibiotics for the cold, set her up for an allergic reaction that closed her airway. As soon as the paramedics injected medication, her throat began to relax.

Sitting in the hospital’s waiting room, with all three of our children, I thought about Jerry Falwell’s spouse and three children, who sat in a similar room less than three weeka ago. That day, their loved one did not get to climb into the car, praising God, but Dr.
Falwell went to glory. As the kids and I stared at those sliding doors, we did not know what news we would hear from the other side. Would the woman you and I love be going to her earthly home or her heavenly home on this stormy Saturday morning? I am confident that my wife was as prepared for Heaven as if she was already there.

Today the Lord must have said, “Not yet. There is more work for you and more marriages to touch before you join me for eternity.” That is the real reason we toil for the Lord, to help people prepare to meet Jesus face to face. I need to ask you a serious question. If that had been you, in the back of a rescue truck, flashing lights breaking the pre-dawn morning, two paramedics working to keep you breathing, would you have been ready to face the Lord, or would you have had repenting and confessing to do?
Charlyne does not know when her days are over, nor do I, nor do you, nor does your prodigal spouse, but today may you make sure all is at peace between you and your Lord God. If you want to learn more, please see Salvation.

Thank you for your prayers today,
Bob Steinkamp”

As I racked my brain for a topic for tonight’s FAM Chat, I was frustrated, because I was drawing a total blank. Usually we’ve had a prevailing topic of conversation through the week to draw from, but this week was mostly praise reports or some of the same issues we’ve recently discussed. So I even considered making it an evening for open discussion without a preset topic. And even though I wasn’t getting anything else, I immediately felt that wasn’t the way to go either. So I told the Lord that I was running out of time and REALLY needed some help here! So I prayed and prayed and then just waited to hear a reply…but NOTHING was coming! So I finally just said “Well, Lord, I’m waiting, but I’m not getting anything…” And that’s when I got it!

As I considered the frustration of waiting without seeing (or getting) anything, it came to me that while everyone is so excited to share in the awesome praise reports of so many of our members lately; it’s normal to wonder just how long it will be before “our turn” comes…why we’re still waiting for our own miracles, especially when nothing SEEMS to be happening. And as I thought about that, I remembered the following poem about waiting, which I’ve shared on the site previously, but which is ALWAYS worth taking another look at. So here it is:

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried.
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, ‘My Child, you must wait!’
‘Wait?’, you say, wait!’ my indignant reply.
‘Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By FAITH I have asked, and am claiming your Word.
‘My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to WAIT?
I’m needing a ‘yes’, a go-ahead sign,
Or even a ‘no’ to which I can resign.
‘And Lord, you promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry;
I’m weary of asking I need a reply!’
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, ‘You must wait.’
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, ‘So, I’m waiting…for what?’
He seemed then to kneel and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, ‘I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want–but, you wouldn’t know ME.
‘You’d not know the depth of my love for each saint;
You’d not know the power that I give to the faint;
You’d not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there;
You’d not know the joy of resting in me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.
‘You’d never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of my Spirit descends like a dove;
You’d know that I give and I save…(for a start),
But you’d not know the depth of the beat of my heart.
‘The glow of my comfort late into the night.
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that’s beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have LAST.
‘You’d never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that ‘My grace is sufficient for thee.’
Yes, your dreams for your loved ones overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss! If I lost what I’m doing in you!
‘So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
THAT THE GREATEST OF GIFTS IS TO GET TO KNOW ME.
And though oft may my answers seem terribly late,
My wisest of answers is still but to WAIT.’
–Author Unknown

As I reread this, which is one of my all time favorites, a few verses of scripture came to my mind, and they are what we MUST keep in mind as we wait on the Lord’s perfect time for HIS awesome plan for our lives to be perfected, and that He’s working on us during this time too. The first is Matthew 22:3738, which says Jesus replied: ” ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. If we’re honest, most of us have to admit that we fall far short of that, especially if we’re putting the restoration of our marriages above seeking a personal and intimate relationship with our Lord and Savior. That is not good, because even though we don’t often hear about this aspect of God’s nature and character, Exodus 34:14 tells us Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God. In fact, in last week’s chat, several members acknowledged having put their spouses and marriages as an idol above their relationship with God. And then there’s Psalm 37:4, which says Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. But as I thought about that one, I have to admit feeling an “ouch”, because the truth is that most of us don’t consistently delight in the Lord, even though we’re really good about delighting in Him WHEN we have something to praise and rejoice about…but that’s definitely putting the cart before the horse according to what this says. We are to FIRST delight in the Lord, and THEN He will give us the desire of our hearts…and not the other way around. And of course, that goes right along with Matthew 6:33, which says But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. And we have to believe in and fully expect to be rewarded and blessed according to God’s compassion and justice as we wait, because Isaiah 30:18 says Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! And then I thought of Romans 8:28 (NASB), which says And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. When we really believe that, we’ll KNOW there IS a God glorifying reason for the delay in the restoration of our marriages and that God is working EVERYTHING out for our good because we love Him and we are living our lives in accordance to His will as revealed in the Bible….He hates divorce! So we just have to put our hope in the Lord, because Isaiah 40:31 promises but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. And based on the wonderful praise reports we get almost daily now from our members who have already experienced the restoration of their marriages, we know ours will be worth the wait too, because we are seeing how God is very faithfully restoring their marriages to be so much more and better than they ever had before, just as His Word said He would do! So instead of focusing so much on the time it’s taking and how long we’re waiting, let’s focus on getting to know our Lord and Savior better, and then there’s no way to avoid being supernaturally blessed and encouraged!